4.41

5

Feb 20, 2015

I want to just buy a crate of these and pass them out to strangers and friends and family.

5

Mar 15, 2016

Not long ago, I wrote an article about being young and female in Lagos. And an acquaintance told me that it was an angry article, and I should not have made it so angry. But I was unapologetic. Of course it was angry. Gender as it functions today is a grave injustice. I am angry. We should all be angry.
A short, sharp, and effective essay about gender, the wrong ideas many people have about feminism, and why it is so damn important. Even today.

I suppose an "essay" doesn't sound like something Not long ago, I wrote an article about being young and female in Lagos. And an acquaintance told me that it was an angry article, and I should not have made it so angry. But I was unapologetic. Of course it was angry. Gender as it functions today is a grave injustice. I am angry. We should all be angry.
A short, sharp, and effective essay about gender, the wrong ideas many people have about feminism, and why it is so damn important. Even today.

I suppose an "essay" doesn't sound like something most people want to rush out and read. It sounds like a chore, like hard work, like something that you should maybe read... someday... if you ever get around to it. But this doesn't feel like an essay at all. The author delivers a compelling and deeply personal account of her experiences and the experiences of her friends - male and female, young and old, Nigerian and American.

She makes many fantastic points and makes them in a conversational tone, without seeming preachy or patronizing. Looking at the way we treat women and men, and how the expectations we have of both genders is contributing to a gender divide, the author makes an argument for a better future where we are not put into gendered boxes.
We stifle the humanity of boys. We define masculinity in a very narrow way. Masculinity is a hard, small cage, and we put boys inside this cage.
I've actually written a little about this in the past, but I especially like the way she draws attention to the importance of the word itself. Many people are quick to say: "I absolutely believe men and women should be equal, but why call it feminism? Isn't that word exclusive? Why not say humanism (as many people do)?" Even I've been guilty of wondering the same in the past.

I think there are many great arguments for why it should be "feminism" and not just "humanism", "black lives matter" and not just "all lives matter", "gay pride" and not just "sexual pride", but I'll let Adichie do the talking on that issue. She summarizes it marvelously.

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5

Mar 17, 2018

This is the single most convincing essay I’ve ever read on feminism. It does not point fingers and blame men for a cultural mind-set they were born into. Instead, it offers calm logical arguments for positive change going forward. And that’s what the world needs:

“A world of happier men and happier women who are truer to themselves. And this is how to start: We must raise our daughters differently. We must also raise our sons differently.”

Adichie states that the strongest feminist she ever knew This is the single most convincing essay I’ve ever read on feminism. It does not point fingers and blame men for a cultural mind-set they were born into. Instead, it offers calm logical arguments for positive change going forward. And that’s what the world needs:

“A world of happier men and happier women who are truer to themselves. And this is how to start: We must raise our daughters differently. We must also raise our sons differently.”

Adichie states that the strongest feminist she ever knew was a man, and that’s kind of important. This is an essay about building bridges; it appeals directly to men and asks them to look at the world differently: it ask them to look at their actions, ones which were harmless and indirect, but were nevertheless sexist: it tries to make them open their eyes.

“The problem with gender is that it prescribes how we should be rather than recognizing how we are. Imagine how much happier we would be, how much freer to be our true individual selves, if we didn’t have the weight of gender expectations.”

“I am trying to unlearn many lessons of gender I internalized while growing up. But I sometimes still feel vulnerable in the face of gender expectations.”



Gender is the key. Adichie gives an example of how when she first became a teacher she wore male orientated clothing on her first day. She wore a suit so the students would take her more seriously rather than just dressing in a way that made her comfortable. She sacrificed her individuality because of gender expectations. In order to be more authoritative she dressed like a man because a woman would not have had as much respect in such a situation. And that’s truly sad.

The same is true for men who feel unable to express their emotions because such a thing is considered weak and unmanly. We all have the capacity to feel and the fact that fiery emotions are considered a feminine trait is just, well, odd. But that’s the world we live in. Adichie proposes that we ignore such stupid labels and be whoever we wish to be: we are ourselves.

There’s so much negative stigma attached to the word feminist. This book is the true face of modern feminism, read it and you will not be able to fault its logic.

We should all be feminists after. ...more

4

Sep 09, 2018

A short, insightful essay about a topic I am incredibly passionate about: feminism. I was practically nodding my head the entire time as so much of what was brought forth hit home.
However, I had a few issues with heteronormative and cisnormative language. I don't believe she was being intentionally exclusionary, so I'm interested to read her newest feminist essay in the near future!

5

Jan 11, 2016

Why the word feminist? Why not just say you are a believer in human rights or something like that? Because that would be dishonest. Feminism is, of course, part of human rights in general—but to choose to use the vague expression human rights is to deny the specific and particular problem of gender. It would be a way of pretending that it was not women who have, for centuries, been excluded. It would be a way of denying that the problem of gender targets women.

Read this book now.

Find more of my Why the word feminist? Why not just say you are a believer in human rights or something like that? Because that would be dishonest. Feminism is, of course, part of human rights in general—but to choose to use the vague expression human rights is to deny the specific and particular problem of gender. It would be a way of pretending that it was not women who have, for centuries, been excluded. It would be a way of denying that the problem of gender targets women.

Read this book now.

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5

Jan 12, 2019

Educate your children by teaching them equality. Then you'll see the change.

4

Jun 12, 2016

— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Half of a Yellow Sun.

We Should All Be Feminists is a personal, eloquently-argued essay – adapted from the much-viewed Tedx talk of the same name – by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie.
Which I have, not so coincidentally, watched numerous times— so much so that I have come to learn and preform the speech alongside her.

The modified book version of the talk was a very quick and important read that, like the talk, will stay with me for a long time (especially all the beautifully
— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, Half of a Yellow Sun.

We Should All Be Feminists is a personal, eloquently-argued essay – adapted from the much-viewed Tedx talk of the same name – by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie.
Which I have, not so coincidentally, watched numerous times— so much so that I have come to learn and preform the speech alongside her.

The modified book version of the talk was a very quick and important read that, like the talk, will stay with me for a long time (especially all the beautifully poignant quotes):

“He told me that people were saying my novel was feminist, and his advice to me – he was shaking his head sadly as he spoke – was that I should never call myself a feminist, since feminists are women who are unhappy because they cannot find husbands.

So I decided to call myself a Happy Feminist.”

“We have evolved. But our ideas of gender have not evolved very much.”

“We spend too much time teaching girls to worry about what boys think of them. But the reverse is not the case. We don’t teach boys to care about being likeable. We spend too much time telling girls that they cannot be angry or aggressive or tough, which is bad enough, but then we turn around and either praise or excuse men for the same reasons.”



“It is easy to say, ‘But women can just say no to all this.’ But the reality is more difficult, more complex. We are all social beings. We internalize ideas from our socialization.”

“The problem with gender is that it prescribes how we should be rather than recognizing how we are. Imagine how much happier we would be, how much freer to be our true individual selves, if we didn’t have the weight of gender expectations.”

“I know a woman who has the same degree and same job as her husband. When they get back from work, she does most of the housework, which is true for many marriages, but what struck me was that whenever he changed the baby’s nappy, she said thank you to him. What if she saw it as something normal and natural, that he should help care for his child?”

“Some people ask, ‘Why the word feminist? Why not just say you are a believer in human rights, or something like that?’ Because that would be dishonest. Feminism is, of course, part of human rights in general – but to choose to use the vague expression human rights is to deny the specific and particular problem of gender. It would be a way of pretending that it was not women who have, for centuries, been excluded. It would be a way of denying that the problem of gender targets women. That the problem was not about being human, but specifically about being a female human.”

Also, I found this slam poem* to be really fitting with the subject.

(* I featured it in My Top Ten Slam Poems.)

Overall, I was truly impressed with We Should All Be Feminists and hope to read more from the author.

*Note: I'm an Amazon Affiliate. If you're interested in buying We Should All Be Feminists, just click on the image below to go through my link. I'll make a small commission!*


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5

Dec 02, 2018

‘my own definition of a feminist is a man or a woman who says, yes, there is a problem with gender as it is today and we must fix it, we must do better. all of us, women and men, must do better.’

this. this. a thousand times this!

this essay has never been more relevant, important or necessary. it is a wonderful introduction to feminism and its growing purpose in todays society. however, it is just an introduction, as the brief length only allows for adichie to concisely outline what feminism is ‘my own definition of a feminist is a man or a woman who says, yes, there is a problem with gender as it is today and we must fix it, we must do better. all of us, women and men, must do better.’

this. this. a thousand times this!

this essay has never been more relevant, important or necessary. it is a wonderful introduction to feminism and its growing purpose in todays society. however, it is just an introduction, as the brief length only allows for adichie to concisely outline what feminism is and why it is important. but the topic itself is one that could fill tomes. and i have never read a statement that so efficiently and passionately describes the struggle for gender equality.

this book is a call to action, one that every human should be willing to answer.

↠ 4.5 stars ...more

4

Jan 28, 2017

A Nigerian acquaintance once asked me if I was worried that men would be intimidated by me.

I was not worried at all - it had not even occurred to me to be worried, because a man who would be intimidated by me is exactly the kind of man I would have no interest in.

this is the second book i have read from my quarterly literary fiction box from pagehabit:



this is very much like Between the World and Me in the sense that they are both short works addressing huge issues (race, gender) and approaching A Nigerian acquaintance once asked me if I was worried that men would be intimidated by me.

I was not worried at all - it had not even occurred to me to be worried, because a man who would be intimidated by me is exactly the kind of man I would have no interest in.

this is the second book i have read from my quarterly literary fiction box from pagehabit:



this is very much like Between the World and Me in the sense that they are both short works addressing huge issues (race, gender) and approaching them more or less anecdotally, which is a really refreshing approach. i liked this one more than i liked coates' book, which i never even reviewed because i am the worst. (nor have i yet reviewed many of my teeny tiny nonfiction reads from the past year: Consider the Oyster, The Face: Cartography of the Void, The Clothing of Books) but i'm reviewing this one! even though i don't have much in the way of response/content. i love the way adichie writes - this book is conversational and relaxed, there's good flow between her examples and arguments, and her suggestions about how to adjust the way we think about gender and to address inequality are small and manageable, but it's precisely those small, everyday situations where examples set by individuals have an impact on the way the world works, the way we treat other people, the influence on the following generation. 'be the change you wish to see in the world' and all. or, in my own philosophy, 'try not to be an asshole today.' small acts, but big goals:

What is the point of culture? Culture functions ultimately to ensure the preservation and continuity of a people…Culture does not make people. People make culture. If it is true that the full humanity of women is not our culture, then we can and must make it our culture.

a lot of adichie's examples are specific to nigeria - i've never heard of a woman being asked to produce her key in a hotel lobby to ensure she was not a prostitute, and waitstaff in america tend to be, if anything, more attentive to women than to men, but many of her observations do have parallels/relevance to gender issues in my land. in any event, she's a hell of a writer and you should probably read this and see what you can do about making the world a little less obnoxious.

'cuz we could use that right about now.

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5

Aug 05, 2018

I was raised to be a masculinist!

Where I grew up, women did the housework, took care of children, made sure dinner was served, and cleaned up afterwards. Women worked, but only if it did not interfere with the "career" of their husbands, and they worked for lower salaries, and were reminded of that fact - often. If the "Career" required moving, women resigned from their jobs, packed up and left with the family. Women listened to the stories of men, and deferred to their "knowledge", they I was raised to be a masculinist!

Where I grew up, women did the housework, took care of children, made sure dinner was served, and cleaned up afterwards. Women worked, but only if it did not interfere with the "career" of their husbands, and they worked for lower salaries, and were reminded of that fact - often. If the "Career" required moving, women resigned from their jobs, packed up and left with the family. Women listened to the stories of men, and deferred to their "knowledge", they accepted the myth that men knew about finances while they were just "spending" money (quite necessarily, as their husbands couldn't be bothered with the lower chores of grocery shopping and supplying children with clothes, shoes and school materials). Women were likeable, nice-looking, and kind - in public. Under no circumstances did women have political opinions that didn't match their husbands' or challenge their "intellectual superiority" openly. They did not challenge the husbands' right to sit and chat over a bottle of wine while they cleaned the kitchen and put the children to bed. They raised their sons to become bosses and their daughters to have a decent education and a day job that could be managed while running a household. Duktig flicka! I don't know how to translate the Swedish phrase, meaning something to the effect that a girl has to be good, hardworking, modest, restrained, likeable, quiet ... anything but a trouble maker or independent intellectual thinker.

Where I grew up, in liberal Northern Europe, in the 1980s and 1990s, it was common to think that "feminist" is a swearword, something that indicates an angry, ugly, old hag who "didn't get a husband", a person who had by definition "failed" and vented her frustration at her own failure by making life uncomfortable for "successful" people - all out of jealousy. If you read interviews with some of the older members of the Swedish Academy, you will see the kind of male entitlement I refer to. Breaking down the longstanding wall of privilege is painful to them, so they scream. Not Witch Hunt, but: "Feminist!"

Where I grew up, it was common for men to be frustrated when they didn't get to talk nonstop. Each "interruption" by a woman would be silently "tolerated" or challenged.

Where I live now, in the same country, but in a completely different social environment, we try to do what Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie brilliantly suggests: we try to raise our children to be equals. We try to change the language we use when addressing boys and girls, we try to disrupt the tradition of expecting different things from female and male staff, we try to see human beings with individual needs and interests rather than "hard men" and "kind women".

But there is a trend again in the world, and the author of this short essay points it out in the clearest possible way: feminism has again become a negative, something that is thrown in as an insult whenever someone wants to silence a woman who breaks the hidden rule of behaviour, which tells her that her anger is "aggressive", while her male counterpart is "assertive and strong".

We must talk about gender again! And we can't let it be watered down to general "human rights" or "humanism", for there is a gender problem which can only be solved if we acknowledge the fact that it exists. The author uses the example of a black man who tells her not to talk about "feminism", but rather about "humanism", as poor and underprivileged men suffer as well, and so on and so on. The list of "Whataboutisms" is long. That is true, but it doesn't address the problem. My broken leg is not mended by pointing out that my neighbour has a bump on his forehead. The black man had no difficulties talking about his disadvantage as a coloured man, and didn't see that by his own reasoning regarding feminism, the question of racism must by analogy also be watered down to a general fight for "human rights". It is not that easy though - there are problems that relate directly to the notion of white supremacy, and they have to be addressed specifically. And there are problems around gender that have to be honestly treated for what they are.

So I agree with the author that we should all be feminists. We should be the kind of feminist we choose ourselves, and I am quite close to her individual definition of herself as a Happy Feminist Who Doesn't Hate Men And Who Likes To Wear Nice Clothes For Herself. Feminism is about setting the record straight. And to do that, educators and parents need to be aware of the messages we send to the next generation. The adjectives we use DO matter.

This essay is a brilliant discussion starter on the topic!

Read it!

Postscript:

And in case anyone doubts we still have a lopsided society, check out today's article in the Guardian regarding "women having to quit their jobs to fill the gaps in care taking". I think it is about time that we sign up Johnson, Farage, Trump, Putin and all those other "strong" men to do some care taking. After all, it requires some muscle, and men are physically stronger than women, I have been told?
https://www.theguardian.com/society/2...

Postscript 2:

I am thinking of creating a "misogyny of the day" file. Each day, all over the world, we read reports like the following one from Japan, reporting that a school faked test results for decades to make sure more men than women become doctors. The women who would have passed would come in handy in the post Brexit care taking crisis - working for free? But then of course, they would be unwelcome foreigners in UK. Difficult to be racist and misogynist and in need of care.

https://www.theguardian.com/world/201... ...more

5

May 14, 2017

'Culture does not make people. People make culture. If it is true that the full humanity of women is not our culture, then we can and must make it our culture.

I read Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie's We Should All Be Feminists in a single, uninterrupted sitting over two beers at my favourite bar. This is important for two reasons. First, it shows how quickly one is able to read this book, and read it you should. This should be, assuredly, essential reading. At it's worst it is simply a primer and 'Culture does not make people. People make culture. If it is true that the full humanity of women is not our culture, then we can and must make it our culture.

I read Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie's We Should All Be Feminists in a single, uninterrupted sitting over two beers at my favourite bar. This is important for two reasons. First, it shows how quickly one is able to read this book, and read it you should. This should be, assuredly, essential reading. At it's worst it is simply a primer and general basis for examining feminism but even those who have spent a great deal of time studying and living it will find great value in her words. She is powerfully succinct and delivers her message in potent anecdotes easily swallowed in a coating of gorgeous prose than leaves one yearning for more (after finishing this I spent a few months reading everything she had written). Yes, this is just a printed version of her readily and freely accessible TED talk yet it elaborates on a few points and being able to connect with the printed word and drink in her message this way is an extraordinary experience. Secondly, and more importantly, the fact that I was able to read this uninterrupted in a bar is an interestingly gendered privilege that those who disagree that gender plays to extremely biases and unequal treatment should pay attention to. And it is exactly that, a privilege, and because I was able to enjoy my solitude while reading in a crowded bar I need to speak up. Imagine, for a moment, had I been female and alone. Without a doubt, a male figure would have inquired what I was reading and probably would have probed me to talk about it. Or, let's face it, more likely would have not given a damn about what I was reading but used it as a spring board to talk about what he reads and why it makes him so cool. Probably would have tried to get me to drink a bit more. Probably would have ignored that I was sitting there alone trying to read a book and been completely oblivious that his presence was a total, undesired interruption. Knowing myself, I would have been polite and chatted while glancing back at my book each moment the conversation lagged hoping to continue reading. I've seen this happen countless times. A girl alone and enjoying a drink is never left alone. Men swarm like flies. She probably just got off work or is waiting for something. She is assuredly not there for you. She is there for her. Let her be. There is a very good chance I would never have made it more than a dozen pages through this book trying to read it alone and drinking in a bar had I been female. And this is very problematic.

What is it with males who cat-call? Why does it seem that this sort of behavior happens most often when someone is engrossed in their own life, ie. looking at their phone, listening to music or reading a book (also, why is it that so many people see reading a book--and this goes for all genders--as an open invitation to keep talking? I read in my car on lunch breaks for this very reason). It seems to be some creepy ego trip--how dare she have a life that I have no part of they must think. Whats worst are those who see a ring and proceed anyway like some gross primal alpha male domination instinct. It's repulsive and juvenile. The girl you see on the subway or in the bar or at a park or wherever you may be isn't there for you. She isn't wearing a dress to impress you, she just likes that dress. Her make-up wasn't put on that morning to please you. She smiles at you when you say something because that is what polite people do, not an invitation to the bedroom. Please stop this behavior.

'People make culture' Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie says, 'If we do something over and over, it becomes normal. If we see the same thing over and over, it becomes normal.' This sort of animalistic male domineering has gone on for so long that it has become a norm. People talk about creepers in clubs and bars as if it is just an annoyance that comes with the territory instead of a problem that should be addressed, which is very sad to me. Yes, this is not something I have to deal with so I am most definitely speaking out of place and likely offensive to some because of this and I am sorry, but I just am tired to seeing misogynists get away with being creepy assholes because it is just 'something that happens'. This male behavior seeps into all of society and sexualizes everything. Recently I encountered a man with a t-shirt listing 'Rules for Dating My Daughter'. If you are a man and own a t-shirt that discusses your own daughter's sexuality, that isn't cute it is repulsive. Why are you sexualizing your own daughter? Why must we impose sexuality onto anything? 'The problem with gender is that it prescribes how we should be rather than recognizing how we are.' This sort of sexualization in society takes hold in so many ways. Clothing is assessed for how others will respond to it sexually, our speech, our actions, the way we move when passing a stranger on a street, hell even the books we read the shows we watch the hobbies we have all get looked at by society in a way that people assess in a sexualized manner. Girls that like sports or video games are 'hot', girls that read Jane Austen are 'nerds', knitting isn't sexy, etc, et al, and all of it is bullshit. Let people be people and treat them like people. It makes me sad hearing from female friends how many strangers on social media start a conversation with 'hey sexy' or something to that effect. A woman is not her looks, please at least acknowledge she has a brain and a personality first. Do these lines actually work? We teach girls shame. “Close your legs. Cover yourself.” We make them feel as though being born female they’re already guilty of something. And so, girls grow up to be women who cannot say they have desire. They grow up to be women who silence themselves. They grow up to be women who cannot say what they truly think. And they grow up — and this is the worst thing we do to girls — they grow up to be women who have turned pretense into an art form. It is sad to think these are the lessons learned from common interaction with society.

'This is how to start: We must raise our daughters differently. We must also raise our sons differently.'

What is most important from Adichie's words though is that Feminism isn't just something for 'angry women', but something for everyone. 'My own definition is a feminist is a man or a woman who says, yes, there’s a problem with gender as it is today and we must fix it, we must do better. All of us, women and men, must do better.' This is something we all must take to heart. It isn't just about empowering females, but also about teaching males about their own behavior. Male fragility is a real thing and forcing men to submit to gender normative restraints is just as damning as imposing it on females. 'But by far the worst thing we do to males—by making them feel they have to be hard—is that we leave them with very fragile egos. The harder a man feels compelled to be, the weaker his ego is.' Boys tease other boy who cry or might like something that is seen as 'girly'. They force an obdurate normality that becomes like a cancer and the side-effects harm everyone. Much misogyny can be boiled down to a male feeling they must assert a dominance or because they feel threatened. We must teach boys that a self reliant woman isn't a threat but something to be cherished just as much as we should teach girls that being independent and strong isn't something to shrink away from. And then we do a much greater disservice to girls, because we raise them to cater to the fragile egos of males. We teach girls to shrink themselves, to make themselves smaller. We say to girls: You can have ambition, but not too much. You should aim to be successful but not too successful, otherwise you will threaten the man. If you are the breadwinner in your relationship with a man, pretend that you are not, especially in public, otherwise you will emasculate him I find that the concept of the Manic Pixie Dream Girl to be one of the most damning motifs we find in entertainment art forms. This whole idea that a man can tame some wild girl and save her from herself is disturbing. Why can't we have the Well Adjusted and Well Read Dream Girl? The Independent and Business Minded Dream Girl? Another motif in entertainment is that white (male) knight that is the only thing that can save the girl (look at 13 Reasons Why, which is hugely problematic on countless other levels as well, but perpetuated the idea that all of society fails this girl and only the white male love interest can save her but just happens to be too late. Bleh.). We need to teach our children to be strong, to be kind, to be themselves and to see that gender norms are damaging to both themselves and others.

'Gender as it functions today is a grave injustice. I am angry. We should all be angry. Anger has a long history of bringing about positive change. But I am also hopeful, because I believe deeply in the ability of human beings to remake themselves for the better.'

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie is a fantastic speaker and writer that can deliver a heady and multi-faceted topic in such easily accessible ways without sacrificing the weight and magnitude of the ideas. This is a book everyone should read and give thought to. This is a problem that affects us all regardless of our gender and the issues of it should always be first and foremost in our minds and actions if we ever hope to see a change in the world. Treat others like people, with love and not lust, with hope and not hindrance. Let the girl at the bar reading by herself read her book and give her the agency to talk to you if she chooses to, and if she doesn't, don't take it as a slight against yourself. We are all trying to get through this life, lets do it together. I'd like to publicly declare misogyny as my arch-enemy, please join me in the fight to exterminate it. Let education and empathy be our weapons, and always lead by good example.
5/5

'Some people ask: “Why the word feminist? Why not just say you are a believer in human rights, or something like that?” Because that would be dishonest. Feminism is, of course, part of human rights in general—but to choose to use the vague expression human rights is to deny the specific and particular problem of gender. It would be a way of pretending that it was not women who have, for centuries, been excluded. It would be a way of denying that the problem of gender targets women.' ...more

4

Mar 01, 2017

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie is a leading voice in African literature today. She has written three novels and one short story collection that have all won multiple awards. Two years ago she was asked by organizers of the TEDx talk to deliver a lecture on her views on feminism in the 21st century. We Should All Be Feminists is the published essay of her talk, and is a resource that is beneficial to all who read it.

After reading Americanah, I was curious to read one of Adichie's novels that takes Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie is a leading voice in African literature today. She has written three novels and one short story collection that have all won multiple awards. Two years ago she was asked by organizers of the TEDx talk to deliver a lecture on her views on feminism in the 21st century. We Should All Be Feminists is the published essay of her talk, and is a resource that is beneficial to all who read it.

After reading Americanah, I was curious to read one of Adichie's novels that takes place fully in Africa in order to find out more about its culture. In this slim volume, Adichie expresses her views about women's place in Nigerian society. In her Igbo culture, for example, women can not make family decisions, which to her is baffling because she is the only one in her family who is interested in genealogy. In the metropolis of Lagos, women can not go to bars alone, they are viewed a certain way if they go into hotels, and single woman actually wear wedding bands to business meetings. The division of the sexes is clear, and even today women are considered a failure if they do not get married.

Adichie stresses that human nature has not advanced in over one thousand years. Then people were valued for their physical strength so of course men were considered superior beings. Today people are valued for their wisdom and intellect and women comprise 52% of the population, yet men are still ahead. This, she stresses, is because in many cultures, men are considered the breadwinners and woman the domestic workers even if the woman has a higher level of education and a job paying more money than her male counterpart. Adichie believes that in order for women to make strides in Nigerian or any society that people have to view women from a similiar lens as men, or the divisions in society will remain rigid.

Sharing an episode from her schooling, Adichie reminded me of an instance in my own school experience even though we grew up in different countries. In middle school her teacher told their class that the student with the highest test grade would become class monitor. She got the highest grade but a boy became class monitor. Meanwhile in my upbringing I always did better than the boys in my class in our teacher's weekly sports poll. The boys questioned why I won. Unlike Adichie, I got to keep my prize but at a cost of being teased for being better than the boys. In a society that stresses wisdom over brawniness, these two instances would be outliers rather than the norm.

As we move further into the 21st century, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie urges everyone to be a feminist in a positive viewpoint. Feminism does not have to mean that a person hates men, isn't happy, or does not show her girly side. Rather feminist should mean that a person strives for women to have equal access to gains in all facets of society that men have enjoyed for centuries. Only 52 short pages in length, We Should All Be Feminists can be read in under half an hour. It is a wonderful manifesto for the 21st century, and is highly recommended. 4 shining stars, downgraded simply for its short length. ...more

4

Mar 11, 2017

Click here to watch a video review of this book on my channel, From Beginning to Bookend.

We Should All Be Feminists tackles the issue of feminism in the twenty-first century, rallies readers to envision a better, more equal world, and then encourages readers to take action to make that vision a reality.

The misunderstanding and negative stigma associated with the word feminist is eloquently explained in just a few short pages. The clear-headed, concise approach taken by the author to make the Click here to watch a video review of this book on my channel, From Beginning to Bookend.

We Should All Be Feminists tackles the issue of feminism in the twenty-first century, rallies readers to envision a better, more equal world, and then encourages readers to take action to make that vision a reality.

The misunderstanding and negative stigma associated with the word feminist is eloquently explained in just a few short pages. The clear-headed, concise approach taken by the author to make the word and the cause more accessible to all is effective.

But it shows how that word feminist is so heavy with baggage, negative baggage: you hate men, you hate bras, you hate African culture, you think women should always be in charge, you don't wear make-up, you don't shave, you're always angry, you don't have a sense of humor, you don't use deodorant.

Rather than be afraid of the word feminist, readers are encouraged to understand and embrace it.

Much care is given to examining the varied ways in which boys and girls are raised, highlighting the disparate priorities emphasized in their upbringing based solely on their gender.

We spend too much time teaching girls to worry about what boys think of them. But the reverse is not the case.

We raise our girls to see each other as competition - not for jobs or accomplishments, which in my opinion can be a good thing, but for the attention of men.

We do a great disservice to the boys in how we raise them. We stifle the humanity of our boys. We define masculinity in a very narrow way. [. . .] But by far the worse thing we do to males - by making them feel they have to be hard - is that we leave them with very fragile egos.

Citing the norms society has come to accept, and the sexual politics that continue to cause imbalance between genders, the author urges readers to transform their way of thinking and lay the foundation for more equality in future by examining and reforming the way boys and girls are raised.

Gender matters everywhere in the world. And I would like today to ask that we should begin to dream about a plan for a different world. A fairer world. A world of happier men and happier women who are truer to themselves. And this is how we must start: we must raise our daughters differently. We must also raise our sons differently.

Personal stories are interwoven throughout, giving a more intimate feel to this essay, which was adapted from a TEDx talk given by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie in 2013.

We Should All Be Feminists is a small book overflowing with big messages.
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My deepest gratitude to Quarterly.co for providing a free Literary Box with a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Quarterly.co's Literary Box comes with bookish goodies, a feature book, and two additional books selected by the author of the feature novel.



What makes the Literary Box special are the notes written by the author of the feature book. These notes give readers unique insights into the book that only the author would know.

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4

Jan 18, 2017

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie has a presence about her that is stunning!!!!
She is eloquent- lovely - warm - and real! It's natural to immediately love this woman the first time you see her, and listen to her speak.

That said....she is magnificent in her TED TALK -- from which this small pocket size book was then put together. When I read this book - I didn't have nearly the same feeling about it as when I listened to Chimamanda speak.
In fact - I actually debated a few things ( my own voice took off Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie has a presence about her that is stunning!!!!
She is eloquent- lovely - warm - and real! It's natural to immediately love this woman the first time you see her, and listen to her speak.

That said....she is magnificent in her TED TALK -- from which this small pocket size book was then put together. When I read this book - I didn't have nearly the same feeling about it as when I listened to Chimamanda speak.
In fact - I actually debated a few things ( my own voice took off with a mind of its own)....
For example: She asks, "why do we teach girls to aspire to marriage, yet we don't teach boys to do the same"? When I listen to her speak in her Ted talk about this, it felt right ---she was speaking from her experience coming from Africa.
When I read this book - taken at face value- here in America - ( in the Bay Area 2017), I asked myself... did I do this? The answer is no! Neither of my daughters are married - nor do either have children. They are 31 and 35 years of age. My friends have transformed years ago too!!!
Also.... my husband was raised by a single mother - he was not taught specific male stereotype gender roles. He was not raised with a dis -service.
I guess what I'm saying -- is I'm happy to see a few of the issues that were challenged in here -- have transformed. It might be nice to acknowledge the growth.

What makes this book special is CHIMAMANDA!!!!! That's it!!! She's GREAT!!!!
Of the two - I'd pass on this pocket book - and instead listen to her speak this book on her TED TALK......a FEW TIMES!!!

And mostly.... the overall message is a given! Thumbs Up! Amen!!!


Many thanks.... this book was a 'gift' sent to me in a lovely box - with a few books - toys and Tea cup .... ( very kind... very cute - quality books), from The Quarterly Literary Box. 'Surprise Book Treats'.... what will the book world think of next? Very cute and creative - as I said! Thank you for this lovely gift. Love the 'Jane Eyre' black tea! :)


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5

Aug 28, 2015

The fact that feminism is often considered as a negative concept is rather new to me, simply because I've internalized my anger/my annoyance for years and started to point what shocked me to people only recently.

Why is that? Did my family raise me in the belief that we women shouldn't speak up? Hardly. Not once did my parents implied that I shouldn't be ambitious because I was a woman. Every day of my teenage years my mother repeated to me that I should never do something - including sex - that

The fact that feminism is often considered as a negative concept is rather new to me, simply because I've internalized my anger/my annoyance for years and started to point what shocked me to people only recently.

Why is that? Did my family raise me in the belief that we women shouldn't speak up? Hardly. Not once did my parents implied that I shouldn't be ambitious because I was a woman. Every day of my teenage years my mother repeated to me that I should never do something - including sex - that I didn't want to do to fulfill other's expectations and for that, I'm grateful. I am a thirty years old woman who's successful in her work, has been in a fulfilling and loving relationship for 6 years and we don't intend to have children just quite yet. My family is okay with that and never implied that I should start a family because that's what people do.

So, why? What can explain that until a few years ago I used to not stand up when faced to situations where my being was judged by gendered standards? I could say that I don't know, but it wouldn't be true : I genuinely think we are the products of our society and that I had internalized so many biased statements about what I can do as a woman and what I can't that I didn't even notice them anymore. This is why I find this kind of books important.

Short and highly readable but powerful and yes, needed. Because I'll always remember the first time I expressed out loud my anger and bewilderment about a sexist situation : people (including women) told me exactly what the author has been told : "ugh but you're a feminist". And yes, feminist was quite the insult here. So I started reading books. Researching. Noticing more and more generally admitted stereotypes in my everyday life. Now, when I hear someone saying things like (last week in an official meeting), "children can stay here if their mum is busy or their father is at work", I frown and speak up. I'm annoying, but the fact is, I don't fucking care if I am.

"Anger, the tone said, is particularly not good for a woman. If you are a woman, you are not supposed to express anger, because it is threatening." I'll add : because if you're angry people say that you're "making a scene", and god forbid you answer when you're insulted! Earlier last week my little sister was publicly insulted in broad daylight because she was wearing a dress. She called me, baffled to see that nobody reacted and that people told her to calm down because "it was how things were" when she answered angrily in a situation where she had every right to be mad. Don't tell me it's not true that we women are supposed to be kind and pleasant : it stays, in 2015, how most people think, and you're quickly called a - sexually frustrated - bitch when you dare to say that no, thank you, I don't want to be insulted for no reasons.

"We teach females that in relationships, compromise is what a woman is more likely to do.
We raise girls to see each other as competitors - not for jobs or accomplishments, which in my opinion can be a good thing, but for the attention of men."
As a teacher, I can't agree more with the author's statement about how we raise children. If I'm sure that many of you are progressive in that subject, it remains that wrong ideas about what are - and more often than not in people's heads, must be - masculinity and feminity are spread every day and I see it in my pupils' behavior on a daily basis. These stupid expectations hurt both men and women.

"What if, in raising children, we focus on ability instead of gender? What if we focus on interest instead of gender?"
That's why I urge you to read this short essay and I'm going to shove this book in my friends' throat gently and nicely advice my friends to read it. If it can make people more interested in these issues, it would already be a positive step.

For more of my reviews, please visit:
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2

Dec 22, 2018

Nobody could be more disappointed or shocked than me.

We Should All Be Feminists does a lot of things right. It's a quick, easy read that offers some great insight into the basic gist of why feminism is important.

That said, this novella has a lot of problems, with the worst of those being heteronormativity and trans-erasure. Adichie goes to great lengths to completely ignore the mere existence of queer and/or trans individuals, with endless gendered language and assumptions. She revisits the Nobody could be more disappointed or shocked than me.

We Should All Be Feminists does a lot of things right. It's a quick, easy read that offers some great insight into the basic gist of why feminism is important.

That said, this novella has a lot of problems, with the worst of those being heteronormativity and trans-erasure. Adichie goes to great lengths to completely ignore the mere existence of queer and/or trans individuals, with endless gendered language and assumptions. She revisits the "women are biologically inferior" argument many times (which she is essentially in favor of - yikes). She literally even says at one point that she wondered while writing this if women have specific genes to improve their domestic capabilities, like cooking. I've face-palmed so many times in the last twenty minutes.

I wish I was exaggerating, but this entire novella left me speechless. I'm genuinely not sure why it's being lauded as some flawless piece of feminist work, when it is riddled with issues from start to finish. I thought I would have a new favorite author, and instead, I'm just pissed off. ...more

5

Dec 21, 2015

I agree with every single thing in this book! I loved this discussion about feminism from a Nigerian woman's perspective, because Western feminism differs completely from what those women experience every day. I can't wait to read Chimamanda's full-length novels! I have yet to get my hands on one!

4

Apr 03, 2017

“Culture does not make people. People make culture. ”

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie is the author of Americanah and Half of a Yellow Sun, a book that highly recommend. This essay is based on a TED talk with the same title and it encourages us not to be negatively influenced by the bad reputation the word “feminism“ has built and that we need to educate our children to understand the importance of gender equality. I liked some of the arguments brought forward but I did not have the feeling she said “Culture does not make people. People make culture. ”

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie is the author of Americanah and Half of a Yellow Sun, a book that highly recommend. This essay is based on a TED talk with the same title and it encourages us not to be negatively influenced by the bad reputation the word “feminism“ has built and that we need to educate our children to understand the importance of gender equality. I liked some of the arguments brought forward but I did not have the feeling she said something new or groundbreaking. I suspect that her TED talk was more powerful and I feel that the impact of her words is heightened in speech.

I am a feminist. I’ve been a feminist since I was a child and one of the things that made me angry (and still does) is gender expectancy. Since we are little girls we learn that we need to be delicate, girlish, to play with dolls, to like pink (try to find girl toys that are not pink) etc. Girls who have other preferences are called boyish, rebels. I was a girly child but I hated it when my mum other people told me that a girl should/should not do this and that. The same happens when we grow older. We are expected to cook, do house chores, not to eat too much or do anything that will make us a less worthy match. We need to please men, find a husband and procreate. That is meant to be the ultimate goal in the life of a woman, even in a modern society. As Adichie also says, it is not the same thing with men, they are not expected to learn how to please a woman.

„We teach females that in relationships, compromise is what a woman is more likely to do. ”

I know things are improving but there still is a long way to go. I saw some articles the other day about Amal Clooney’s speech at UN where she requested for ISIS to be held responsible for the crimes they committed. Can you guess what the titles of the story were? Amal shows her baby bump at the ONU speech!! Seriously, that was the most important thing to tell about her presence there? Don't get me wrong, it is beautiful that she has a little human growing inside her but I do not think it was the case to talk about that in those circumstances.

That reminds me of a different problem that I face at work sometimes. During business trips I meet mainly with men and I sometimes worry what should I wear. Should I wear a dress, as I usually like to, or should I wear pants in order to be taken more seriously? Adichie touched this subject as well in her essay, discussing one lecture where she decided to dress uncomfortably and out of character in order to be respected.

"The sad truth of the matter is that when it comes to appearance, we start off with men as the standard, as the norm. Many of us think that the less feminine a woman appears, the more likely she is to be taken seriously. A man going to a business meeting doesn’t wonder about being taken seriously based on what he is wearing—but a woman does."

I think people still consider that in order to be successful person (man or woman) one needs to be tough, manly and it angers me. Not everybody is like this and it should not be an aspiration. Each of us, men or women, have our wonderful qualities, we need to cherish them and be ourselves. The pressure that you can only achieve success by being "manly" also affects men who need to live to the expectations. I liked that Adichie also discusses the expectations society has for men and that they can also be harmful.

"Gender matters everywhere in the world. And I would like today to ask that we begin to dream about and plan for a different world. A fairer world. A world of happier men and happier women who are truer to themselves. And this is how to start: We must raise our daughters differently. We must also raise our sons differently." ...more

4

Aug 04, 2014

This is the published version of CNA's famous Tedx talk which I had put on my youtube 'watch later' list and never quite managed to get to in the end.

It's so perfectly presented and written (albeit in a very simplistic manner with little to no token humor thrown in to engage a live audience) that I don't know how to review this except by saying I nodded my head vigorously to every logical inference Adichie drew from her own experiences and those of her family and acquaintances in Nigeria and the This is the published version of CNA's famous Tedx talk which I had put on my youtube 'watch later' list and never quite managed to get to in the end.

It's so perfectly presented and written (albeit in a very simplistic manner with little to no token humor thrown in to engage a live audience) that I don't know how to review this except by saying I nodded my head vigorously to every logical inference Adichie drew from her own experiences and those of her family and acquaintances in Nigeria and the U.S. Even her anecdote about a friend named Louis who kept telling her, "I don't see what you mean by things being different and harder for women. Maybe it was so in the past but not now. Everything is fine now for women." rung true in my ears because I have a friend exactly like Louis who used to think everything is hunky dory for women these days until I successfully talked him out of that delusion. My only grouse is that I would have loved for CNA to expand on the core themes of her lecture and write a series of full-fledged essays on the topics instead of publishing this short talk.

Also here's what she says about those who raise objections to the term 'feminism' -
Some people ask: "Why the word feminist? Why not just say you are a believer in human rights, or something like that?" Because that would be dishonest. Feminism is, of course, part of human rights in general - but to choose to use the vague expression human rights is to deny the specific and particular problem of gender. It would be a way of pretending it was not women who have, for centuries, been excluded. It would be a way of denying that the problem of gender targets women. That the problem was not about being human, but specifically about being a female human.
There. Thank you for saying that Chimamanda. ...more

5

Dec 07, 2018

LOVED THIS. Listening to Adichie read this little book to me was a treat. She’s so well-spoken and intelligent, I can’t help but love everything I’ve read by her so far!

5

Jan 10, 2016

This reiterated many of my own beliefs but in such a concise and well developed argument. I'd highly recommend this to anyone curious about feminism and gender studies because it's the perfect intro.

4

Nov 09, 2017

“Women’s rights have come a long way”; something we’ve all heard before. But we’ve got a long way to go, I think we all agree on that. No one person’s actions, thoughts, or words are going to end the oppression, if I may use that word. But we can all contribute something positive, something that creates a dialogue about change, something that becomes “another brick in the wall”. Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s essay is just that, but it’s a very big brick, and it’s truths are undeniable. Everyone “Women’s rights have come a long way”; something we’ve all heard before. But we’ve got a long way to go, I think we all agree on that. No one person’s actions, thoughts, or words are going to end the oppression, if I may use that word. But we can all contribute something positive, something that creates a dialogue about change, something that becomes “another brick in the wall”. Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s essay is just that, but it’s a very big brick, and it’s truths are undeniable. Everyone should read this, regardless of their preconceived ideas on the subject. ...more

5

Mar 18, 2018

FEMINIST: A person who believes in the social, political, and economic equality of the sexes.

I was raised by two feminist my mother and my father. Though my father would never call himself a feminist not because its a dirty word but because he believes as does Ms. Adiche that we should all be feminist. My mother was a feminist but she too would never call herself that, because she was told on multiple occasions by other feminist that she wasn't one because she chose to stay home and raise my FEMINIST: A person who believes in the social, political, and economic equality of the sexes.

I was raised by two feminist my mother and my father. Though my father would never call himself a feminist not because its a dirty word but because he believes as does Ms. Adiche that we should all be feminist. My mother was a feminist but she too would never call herself that, because she was told on multiple occasions by other feminist that she wasn't one because she chose to stay home and raise my sister and me. These women liked to tell my mother that she was setting women back 20 years and that she was being controlled by my father.

None of you guys ever got the pleasure of meeting my mother but I can tell you one thing..

No One Controlled Donna Patton EVER!

I feel as though both feminist and non feminist fall in to the trap of thinking that you can't be a stay at home mom and a strong independent feminist at the same time. My dad didn't force my mother to quit being a nurse and stay home. My mother made that decision, because she controlled her own life. My dad may have made the money but my mom made all the decisions. My dad is strong enough to handle a strong woman.

In We Should All Be Feminist Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie simply asks that we take a look at how society effects gender dynamics. Society tells us you can't be both feminine and be taken seriously. Society tells us that if you hadn't been wearing that miniskirt you wouldn't have been raped. Society tells us that men can't be sensitive they must always be hard and strong.

Ms. Adiche asks us to look at all the little ways societal gender roles are ingrained in all of us. I still expect the guy to pay when we go out to eat. Does that make me less of a feminist? I don't think so but it probably does to those women who looked down on my mother for staying home to raise her kids.

A must read for All genders.

Popsugar 2018: A book about feminism
Around the Year in 52 Books: An Own Voices Book. ...more

0

Jan 20, 2017

I wish this were required reading for everyone. I have been recommending it to every person I know. It’s a short book, took me around an hour and it is so worth it. Based on a TED Talk by the same name, Adichie discusses the weight and stereotypes around the word “feminist” and why we should all identify as such. I recommend this book as a gateway to gender studies and feminism because it is very accessible, especially to those with no experience in reading/studying these subjects. My mother is I wish this were required reading for everyone. I have been recommending it to every person I know. It’s a short book, took me around an hour and it is so worth it. Based on a TED Talk by the same name, Adichie discusses the weight and stereotypes around the word “feminist” and why we should all identify as such. I recommend this book as a gateway to gender studies and feminism because it is very accessible, especially to those with no experience in reading/studying these subjects. My mother is not a reader but she picked this up on my suggestion and loved it.

— Patricia Elzie


from The Best Books We Read In January 2017: http://bookriot.com/2017/02/01/riot-r...
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This is a SHORT book. Almost more an essay, it is based on Adichie’s TED talk of the same name. Other than wanting SO MUCH MORE, it was essentially perfect. I read an ebook but have every intention of collecting paperbacks to scatter everywhere that I go.

— Annika Barranti Klein


from The Best Books We Read In December 2016: http://bookriot.com/2017/01/03/riot-r... ...more

5

Mar 10, 2016

If you have only thirty minutes of time left, then listen to the author, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, reading her essay here for free. Whether you are a feminist or not, whether you are male or female, you won't regret listening to this, regardless of what your current view on the much-debated topic of feminism is like. Either she will open your eyes to some aspects you never thought about before, or she will convince you of your already established opinion. However it turns out for you, in my If you have only thirty minutes of time left, then listen to the author, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, reading her essay here for free. Whether you are a feminist or not, whether you are male or female, you won't regret listening to this, regardless of what your current view on the much-debated topic of feminism is like. Either she will open your eyes to some aspects you never thought about before, or she will convince you of your already established opinion. However it turns out for you, in my opinion, Chimamanda is an amazing person who deserves all the attention for what she put into words with her nonfictional essay on feminism.

In our modern culture, the word feminism is always associated with a negative concept, and I don't blame anyone for this - not as long as some German politicians want to equalize the female amount of little traffic light men because they feel like gender equality should be visible at traffic lights. Shouldn't it be more important to focus on equal opportunities at work, on the (sadly) still existing way women are looked at as something less in a lot of countries? Apparently not, if you look at what some politicians say nowadays.

In her essay, Chimamanda talks about how, especially in Nigeria, but also in a lot of other countries, young men are taught how they need to be "hard men", how they need to be physically strong and take over a leading role in order to take care of the "weaker" women. And she criticizes exactly this - with good reason.

Recently a young woman was gang raped in a university in Nigeria. And the response of many young Nigerians, both male and female, was something along the lines of this: "Yes, rape is wrong. But what is a girl doing in a room with four boys?" Now if we can forget the horrible inhumanity of that response, these Nigerians have been raised to think of women as inherently guilty, and have been raised to expect so little of men that the idea of men as savage beings without any control is somehow acceptable. We teach girls shame. Close your legs. Cover yourself. We make them feel as though by being born female they're already guilty of something.
I can only talk about my own experience now as a young man about how it is in Germany, but what I had to learn so far was this: A lot of people have no idea of what the concept of feminism truly means, they think of it as something some weirdly-brained writers of bad self-help books must have invented in order to torture humans with their implausible beliefs. And this is something that angers me, because not only do some men find pleasure in treating women like shit, some women also encourage them to do so. But inspite of that, this is no excuse for rape. Nothing can excuse something as horrible as rape, something that should never be wished upon any person. Never ever.

I am angry about this. I am angry about the fact that if you refer to "Studenten" (German for "students") instead of "Studentinnen und Studenten" (German for "female and male students"), you will immediately be verbally attacked because you downgraded women, but if you treat women like garbage, you will be praised as the ultimate male hero everyone else has to look up to. I am angry that in order to be looked at as a "man", you have to raise yourself up from women - otherwise there will always be people who start laughing when you call yourself a man and who are going to say that someone like you could only be a "kiddie". Or at least that's what society tends to make us believe.

Chimamanda also mentioned that a lot of people argue how female apes bow down to male apes, and after all, apes are our relatives, right? Her answer to this, simple and humorous alike: "But the point is, we're not apes. Apes also live on trees and have earth worms for breakfast, but we don't." And she couldn't be more correct about this. After all, men are human just the way women are human, except for the obvious biological differences, and if you put this into a simple mathematical equation, it would be something along the lines of this:
men = human
women = human
Thus, the following must apply as well: men = women
(See? Sometimes maths is good for something after all!)


More people need to read this book. More women, but also more men, because the term "feminist" doesn't mean that you need to be a woman in order to be a feminist. It is sad to see how only a handful of male Goodreads users have read this book, even though Chimamanda doesn't only talk about how women need to fight for their rights, she also talks about how men need to learn to accept women as equal.

This essay should definitely be required reading in school. You can't learn the lessons Chimamanda teaches in her text early enough. Even more importantly, she doesn't say that you need to be a feminist (even though the title implies so). No, she talks to you about the situation in Nigeria and other countries, and she makes you think about it and allows you to form your own opinion. And that's what I truly respect her for.

You are a feminist? Fine, then you might still learn something from this essay.
You are no feminist? Good, that's even more of a reason for you to click on that link on top of my review. ...more