Rules of the Game Info

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Neil Strauss, New York Times bestselling author of
The Game, now brings readers a portable, omnibus paperback
edition of his box set Rules of the Game—a unique how-to
guide for pickup artists (The StyleLife Challenge) and a volume
of Game stories (The Style Diaries)—with new bonus
material. The Stylelife Challenge is the manual Strauss, author
of Emergency, thought he’d never write: the ultimate
guide to landing the woman of your dreams, while The Style
Diaries
takes readers further into the seduction underworld than
ever before, and delves where The Game never dared to tread:
into the even more complicated rules of relationships.

Average Ratings and Reviews
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Reviews for Rules of the Game:

2

Jun 01, 2013

There’s a class of self-help books for men, books with bold titles like “ROAR OF THE MAN-WARRIOR” and “THE SEX GOD WITHIN” that promise explosive increases in sex/money/power/general satisfaction of desire for any man with stones enough to take the plunge. This book is one of them. It was literally thrown at me by my helpful roommate one dark day when my romantic despair was so intense it was almost bending the light around my head.

I’d heard tell of the book before, of PickUp Artist-ry and its There’s a class of self-help books for men, books with bold titles like “ROAR OF THE MAN-WARRIOR” and “THE SEX GOD WITHIN” that promise explosive increases in sex/money/power/general satisfaction of desire for any man with stones enough to take the plunge. This book is one of them. It was literally thrown at me by my helpful roommate one dark day when my romantic despair was so intense it was almost bending the light around my head.

I’d heard tell of the book before, of PickUp Artist-ry and its profound potential to transform you into a Randian Titan of pure will with respect to the female connections you want in your life. I’d also heard that PickUp makes you into a horrible misogynist asshole, framing women as sexual-gatekeepers to be manipulated and even tricked into giving up the warmth between their legs if that’s you really want them to do. I did my sincere best to bracket that noise and come at it fresh and open to new ideas and experience, figuring I could just take the good and laugh at the bad(1).

See, humans and human connections and humanity in general are deeply important to me both concretely and conceptually, kind of replacing capital-G God in my little cosmology(2). But they/you (humans) are complicated and hard. Human interaction more often than not leaves me feeling fried and drained and in desperate need of several hours of solid solitude. Being on stage isn’t too bad - the audience blurs together into a nameless homogenous mass and I get really plugged-in to whatever it is that I’m talking about and my self-consciousness slips away and it’s somehow both exhilarating and peaceful at the same time. But one-on-one the task of weaving my emotions into the immediate experience that I share with another concrete human being is a different beast altogether.

So that’s the ladder I wanted to climb when I opened this book. I wanted more tools for human interaction, more confidence(3) in my ability to interact with humans in ways that don’t include transparently interrogating them or steering the conversation to a technical topic I like so I can show off the stuff I’ve been thinking about lately. With rare exceptions girls(4) don’t respond to discursive seductions with much positivity, that kind of human interaction taking as its medium the language of looks and smiles(5) rather that the intricate grunts and marks that make up my textual relationships.

But enough about me(6). This particular book opens(7) by jarring you to get your attention, the first page having a big READ ME title and the rest of the intro spent mostly mocking you for being so weak as to mindlessly follow orders. This is gimmicky and dumb. There’s one sentence where the author takes it back, but it doesn’t really matter - what does matter is that from the very outset this guy has established presence and power, which is basically what he claims he can give to you if you buckle down and do exactly what he says.

The rest of the book follows this tone, with terse imperative sentences describing your ‘missions’, giving you your ‘daily briefings’, lauding the brand of the Stylelife(8) Challenge and the in-group of the ‘Challengers’ that now includes you in their epic community of men who have lifted the wool from their eyes and have unlocked the badass secrets of masculinity and attraction and power.

The military con- and de-notations are definitely intentional. My most sympathetic interpretation would be that most people need this kind of hardass discipline if they’re going to seriously step outside of their comfort zone, and the fuck-you attitude of the writing style can serve as a source thereof if the feeble reader can’t conjure the man-juice from within(9).

The book’s divvied up into 30 days worth of the prenominate missions and briefings, and the reader is advised (or, rather, ordered) to read the book one day at a time and do every single thing as-instructed. No reading ahead, no skipping out on assignments. There are a few fields for you to fill out answers to questions, some good (what are your strengths and goals in life) and some bad (explain with detail exactly how you will suffer if you fail to change your broken ways).

The calendar is supposed to take you from the zero at which you start to getting a date, defined as any agreement to meet with a woman after first meeting her as a stranger. The author goes over Opening, Demonstrating Value, Disqualifying(i.e. making her work for it), etc. I didn’t encounter the notorious ‘Negging’ wherein you insult and generally try to hurt a girl to get an emotional reaction from her(10), which was nice. There was indeed some positive and good advice to be found, such as making human interaction about enriching other people rather than satisfying some desperate need of yours for sex and affirmation(11). Also worth attention is the idea of just having fun wherever you go, bringing value and positive-vibes into your own life and into the lives of others no matter what the ups and downs of what happens to you over the course of any given evening.

But. The good advice is vague and can be found from other more-robust sources. What makes this book less-robust is the lengthy digressions on NeuroLinguistic Programming, Astrology, Psychic readings, and Evolutionary Psychology. By EvoPsych I mean the “listen, girls just want to fuck your money” type of pop-crap that justifies a nasty STEM-brand of gender-essentialism which makes much of the Internet the misogynistic hellscape that it is. So that’s where the book lost me. The Missions involved a lot of this, explicitly telling you to go out and engage girls about, say, how the rings on their fingers predict the planets they were born under and the personality implications thereof, etc. I can’t do that. Really.

Once I checked out I slammed through the rest of the book, chuckling over the author’s little admonitions against not doing the homework, and now we’re here.

What did I learn? Some things! It is generally good to be happy and fun and playful when you’re out and about, and I’m a bit better at conjuring and expressing that kind of social feeling now. So that’s good. Also well and fine is the attention to nonverbal detail the book helped illuminate - as mentioned somewhere in here I feel way more conscious and aware of words and abstract stuff(see (6)) and that’s generally how I interface with humans (i.e. perceiving much of identity through word-choice and -style) and that’s definitely not going to help anyone do anything on a crowded dance floor.

But that’s like 28% of the book right there. The rest kind of sucks and it’s delivered like the text is biblical. It kind of inspired that kind of reaction(i.e. holy) from its fans when I mentioned I was reading the thing, the eyes widening and the head tilting back and a serious smile breaking out as they remember and behold the book’s total glory once again. Not me.

I don’t plan on instantiating a system when I interact with you, regardless of how I feel about you. Not here, not anywhere, not ever. You’re worth sincerity and spontaneity and actual candor, including the kind that I can only really find in writing. For better or for worse I think rawness and openness and serious-togetherness are all we can really hope for - some beautiful people live this lovely life effortlessly, and the rest of us can only try .


ADDENDA

(1) I think it’s a fine and important exercise to read books that are morally questionable and/or endorsed by people you hate. I tend to come away with a better understanding of my ideas, of the ideas of my enemies, and with a deeper appreciation for how someone like me might conceivably believe something horrible like that.

(2) This cosmological ‘foundation’ used to be capital-S Science as a way of communing with the capital-U Universe, captured in the Saganite aphorism “we are a way for the Universe to understand itself”. I’ve long since shed the idea that reality has a preferred description of itself, that we have epistemic duties towards any kind non-human power. I think atheism has conceptual consequences that my old New Atheist movement glosses over and ignores (basically keeping God but stripping it of its personality), but it (the movement) remains a step (rather than a leap) in a good atheistic direction.


(3) I think the deepest reason that people read books like these and consider them to be a success is because like 85% of inter-human success comes from having the self-assurance to take any action at all.

(4) Here I mean ‘girls’ in the sense of casually referring to younger females the same way ‘guys’ casually refers to younger males. I know there’s a bunch of problems with the word with its diminutive connotations, but ‘Females’ seems sterile and ‘Women’ to me implies (following Louis C.K.(4.1)) childbearing and much more life-experience than had by the my-age people I generally find myself attracted to. Gender-reference is a real head-clutcher and as a creature of almost-maximal privilege(4.2) I really do my sincere best to not accidentally oppress anybody, and I’m sorry if I fail.

(4.1) Contrary to the hopes and dreams of immature people everywhere Louis C.K. emphatically did NOT make the word ‘faggot’ somehow okay to use. Hearing that word used makes me want to gather a crowd and publically push my thumbs into the offending vocal chords.


(4.2) Sub-maximal since little-ol’-me is neither super-rich nor Christian.


(5) Tolstoy’s words, but man do I wish they were my own.

(6) Just kidding. As half-alluded to somewhere around the main text(6.1) textuality is where I’m at my most relaxed and spontaneous and present, inhering in here with every word, so even when I’m not explicitly referenced every inch of this piece is soaked and saturated with my identity. At least until you read it, then you’re in here with me too. Hi.

(6.1) I’d really like to index the main-text to more effectively link back and forth between the footnotes and main-text words/sentences/paragraphs, but I feel like hyper-indexicality’s the kind of PoMo metafuckery that’d be better left for another day. But man will it be fun.


(7) In this book ‘open’ is treated as a half-technical term, basically referring to the action of starting a conversation with someone you’re interested in. This, to me, is the single hardest part of being in public.

(8) Seriously.

(9) This is almost too silly but I’m leaving it in anyway.

(10) From what I've heard from the girls that I’ve talked to about dating a lot of guys seriously will do this. For all the male bitching and moaning about having to deal with huge amounts of rejection from women it seems also and even more-so true that the acts of selection and rejection take their own heavy emotional toll, especially when some guys will do literally anything to provoke a response from you.

(11) It’s really easy to run these two together, unfortunately. ...more
5

December 9, 2017

This book not only helps your confidence but improves your game. Don't believe it? Get the book and you will double your female interaction from 0 to 6, 12, or more ( your mom and sister or their friends don't count as female interaction)
3

Jul 30, 2011

Some notes:

One exercise: call a wrong number and get the person who answers to recommend a movie. "The point isn't just to talk with strangers. It's to learn how to change the course of an interaction without making the other person uncomfortable." - p29

"'Rejection' is another word that has been misused and misrepresented. The dictionary definition of 'reject" is 'to refuse to accept.' So if you offer someone a stick of gum, and she says 'No thanks,' you've been rejected. Do you feel an Some notes:

One exercise: call a wrong number and get the person who answers to recommend a movie. "The point isn't just to talk with strangers. It's to learn how to change the course of an interaction without making the other person uncomfortable." - p29

"'Rejection' is another word that has been misused and misrepresented. The dictionary definition of 'reject" is 'to refuse to accept.' So if you offer someone a stick of gum, and she says 'No thanks,' you've been rejected. Do you feel an emotional sting? Probably not. / If you invite someone to a social event, and she says 'No thanks,' it shouldn't be any different. But for most people it is different, and here's why: When the gum is rejected, we think the person doesn't want the gum. But when we extend and invitation and get rejected, we think she doesn't want us. / But how could she possibly have decided she doesn't want us? She's known us only for a short while. She's practically a complete stranger. She doesn't know how great we are, the way our friends and family do. Why do we value her opinion over theirs?" - p50

"You can open by saying almost anything when you're confident, congruent, and upbeat....Next time you see someone you want to talk to, open your mouth and say the first thing that comes to mind. As long as your comment or question isn't rude or hostile, you may be surprised by how difficult it is to get solidly rejected." - p51

"Chris Rock has a routine in which he explains that anything a man says to a woman translates as 'How about some dick?'" Your goal is to start a conversation with a woman without saying 'How about some dick?'" - p56

"Make sure you pay attention to the men in a group. If they feel you're not respecting or acknowledging them, they'll try to end the interaction." - p59

Don't open by asking a question; they can say no and shut you down. Don't begin by apologizing; "starting a conversation this way makes you sound insecure at best and like a panhandler at worst." - p59

One of the best openers is to get advice on a personal story. You can get opinions, start a conversation. - p60

Good openers have a root (why you're asking) and a time constraint (to reassure that you're not going to stick around forever). - p63

"There is no such thing as rejection, only feedback." - p69

"Who do you blame when something goes wrong during an approach? If you catch yourself saying a situation was impossible, the guys were jerks, or the woman was just a 'bitch,' then you're wrong. It's your fault. It's always your fault. And that's a good thing, because it means you're in control." - p69

"To disqualify a woman, demonstrate early in an interaction that you're not interested in her. Even though you may be chasing her, disqualification turns the tables and makes her want to chase you." - p74

But don't disqualify a woman who might feel you're out of her league. - p75

Women test men. "Men normally sit there answering the questions like they're on a game show, hoping that if they accumulate enough points, she'll choose them. What they don't realize is that they're losing points simply by submitting to the test." - p75

Couple disqualification with qualification (acceptance): the push-pull. - p77

On the differences between men and women: There is "research estimating that 75% of gay men in San Francisco have had more than one hundred partners (25% have had more than one thousand), while in contrast most lesbians have had fewer than ten partners in their lifetime." - p110

"Over dinner one night, the Stylelife coaches and I were reviewing the topics women seem to enjoy discussing most. One was relationships, another was spirituality, and a third was animals." - p222

"See that guy over there? He just told me he knows kung fu. Why do you think he would say that to me out of the blue?" - p226

"Can you hold on to this for a sec? ... Thanks ... A friend of mine taught me that the best way to butt into a conversation is to give someone something to hold. And I wanted to test it out." - p227

Good bar trick: the five questions bet. - p235

Good way to ramp up physicality: the quadruple hand test, Style's kiss close. - p255, p257

"As she hit the mattress, a giggle dislodged." - p309

"I once told the story of Sleeping Beauty to a young cousin of mine. 'How can a prince fall in love with a girl who's sleeping?' she asked afterward." - p331

"Every single man needs a sexually adventurous woman to distract him from the fact that he's unloved." - p333 ...more
3

Jan 23, 2012

I think the book had some good points and was an enjoyable read. A person who follows the rules will definitely improve his (or even hers) social skills. I however doubt that it is possible to achieve all the goals in one month. The book also doesn't really offer any magical key for scoring that you wouldn't find in other self-help-ish books. Or maybe that's just how I see it - nobody have tried all of these "tricks" on me, so perhaps I'm wrong.
4

Jan 08, 2008

This book creates a 30 day 'bootcamp' to help train any man to improve his 'game' Each day, the book provides exercises and learning outcomes to help each man build out his repertoire and confidence when talking and approaching women.

I have read a number of books about picking up chicks to hone my game. The top three are the mystery method, How to be successful with women, and this book.

If you want to start dating better women, get those three books. I promise you a more exciting and rewarding This book creates a 30 day 'bootcamp' to help train any man to improve his 'game' Each day, the book provides exercises and learning outcomes to help each man build out his repertoire and confidence when talking and approaching women.

I have read a number of books about picking up chicks to hone my game. The top three are the mystery method, How to be successful with women, and this book.

If you want to start dating better women, get those three books. I promise you a more exciting and rewarding dating life lies ahead.

The second book wasn't too special. But if you are starting out and / or have a hard time approaching women, the 30 day bootcamp is a great place to start. ...more
4

Apr 02, 2009

Just when you thought all the PUA stories were told, Neil cranks out another soon to be bestseller. A fascinating sequel to Strauss's groundbreaking pick up artist classic with a twist. The void of male social dynamics and pick up advice with substance is masterfully filled with the entry of Rules of the Game. His techniques are compelling, and his tales are infectious page turners.

This slickly packaged title is a two volume set. Its focus begins with establishing your identity, expectations Just when you thought all the PUA stories were told, Neil cranks out another soon to be bestseller. A fascinating sequel to Strauss's groundbreaking pick up artist classic with a twist. The void of male social dynamics and pick up advice with substance is masterfully filled with the entry of Rules of the Game. His techniques are compelling, and his tales are infectious page turners.

This slickly packaged title is a two volume set. Its focus begins with establishing your identity, expectations and desires to better concentrate your efforts on your relationship goals. It dissects the psychology of female expectations, and lays out in classroom format the smooth adaptable skills that satisfy their wants and needs to create physical and an emotional connection.

Part one -the Stylelife Challenge is a 30 day instructional mental-workout program; the HOW TO for improving your social marketing; perfecting your personality, body language and image, creating sexual chemistry and attraction; virtually 100s of tips, exercises, and techniques, logically explained step by step.

What I really liked is he explains exactly how and why each facet of your studies works, and assigns you homework. You're forced to do somewhat uncomfortable things until you become a natural through repetition; till each skill is performed effortlessly. Each chapter builds and expands on the previous. After learning all 30 you've got the mindset and confidence to have Game.

Part 2 - The Style Diaries: fascinating to unusual stories from the trenches that focus on the unexpected bad results that occur due to bad decisions in the middle of encounters. It's the HOW NOT TO game women. As always, Neil's infamous story telling of underworld situations are riveting and bizarre, from conquests to hilarious train wrecks. Edge of your seat field reports brilliantly written. He hangs with the who's who of Rock Stars and travels the globe, injecting himself in situations most of us can only dream of. The conquests could be penned in a braggadocio style, but his writing is self-deprecating and fun; he's learning and laughing along with us. A contagious writing style.

Rules of the Game is a very unique concept, and needed to be written. The first title simply left too many men desiring all the PUA tools Style used in the previous title. It's an advanced classroom explaining how he learned to execute all the killer pulls of hot women in the Game. If you're reading this, you've probably already read Mystery's manual. I'd also highly suggest for deeper PUA psychology and a million laughs another bestseller in this genre.

The_Professional_Bachelor_Dating_Guide_How_to_Exploit_Her_Inner_Psycho ...more
1

May 07, 2010

Maybe it's me, but what the hell is the point of this book? It reads like part-memoir part-porn with a subtle moral attached in the end. Based on the average rating of this book, perhaps only people who are in the loop will get it. I just don't.
4

Dec 12, 2014

I read this as a self-help book, not just as a treatise on picking up girls. (I'm already married, and before that I never found meeting nice women difficult.)

there are plenty of people who judge their lives by their sexual performance, and they are probably the target for this book. But, meeting girls is a lot like meeting friends, finding a job, buying a car, and winning at poker. So, the lessons of the book can be applied more widely than with the ladies.

I have recommended this to men and to I read this as a self-help book, not just as a treatise on picking up girls. (I'm already married, and before that I never found meeting nice women difficult.)

there are plenty of people who judge their lives by their sexual performance, and they are probably the target for this book. But, meeting girls is a lot like meeting friends, finding a job, buying a car, and winning at poker. So, the lessons of the book can be applied more widely than with the ladies.

I have recommended this to men and to women. again, if you're looking for a book to teach you how to pick up girls, then a book is the wrong place for you to be looking. But if you want to be more confident and self-aware, this is a good place to start. ...more
3

Jan 08, 2012

I didn't read much of this one at all. Unlike Strauss's earlier book, this one is a workbook and is hard to read without doing. That's the point, of course, and is no criticism. It just didn't serve my purposes as I didn't intend to do the project, but was just interested in the book after the previous one.
2

Nov 04, 2013

I originally became familiar with Neil Strauss after stumbling upon his novel, “The Game” which was (as its subtitle explains) about his adventure in penetrating the secret society of pickup artists. Having been highly entertained and taught much about life through that book, I decided to pick up this sequel.

The book is split into two parts: the first is titled “The Stylelife Challenge” in which he gives instructions on how to “Master the Game in 30 days.” The second part is titled “The Style I originally became familiar with Neil Strauss after stumbling upon his novel, “The Game” which was (as its subtitle explains) about his adventure in penetrating the secret society of pickup artists. Having been highly entertained and taught much about life through that book, I decided to pick up this sequel.

The book is split into two parts: the first is titled “The Stylelife Challenge” in which he gives instructions on how to “Master the Game in 30 days.” The second part is titled “The Style Diaries” and is more along the lines of the aforementioned novel “The Game” in that it is comprised of stories from his own adventures in the pickup game.

I have to say that I did not follow the 30-day instructions of “The Stylelife Challenge” to try and transform my “game.” But there is much to learn here, and not just about girls, but also about life in general. Each section begins with a lesson on life, followed by homework that you are to complete to try and master that lesson. I read all of these lessons and although like I said, I didn’t do the homework side of it, a lot of them were eye opening. I learned things like “One of the keys to drawing people to you – and making them want to stay there – is radiating positivity” and also about social proof, and about how to show confidence and other ideas about self improvement. The second part titled “The Style Diaries” were entertaining in the same vein of the aforementioned “The Game” but each story also had lessons of their own to teach.
...more
3

Jun 13, 2010

I have read the Style Diaries, but did not read or do the stylelife challenge. I have found that Strauss's books around the pickup community are more balanced, and reflect a more empowering view of the game than other PUA's. This particular short book embodies this even more by showing the foibles and errors of Style and where the game fails to satisfy, subtly asking the question of "what now?" A fun and valuable read if you have read or been a part of the PUA community, if you haven't, you will I have read the Style Diaries, but did not read or do the stylelife challenge. I have found that Strauss's books around the pickup community are more balanced, and reflect a more empowering view of the game than other PUA's. This particular short book embodies this even more by showing the foibles and errors of Style and where the game fails to satisfy, subtly asking the question of "what now?" A fun and valuable read if you have read or been a part of the PUA community, if you haven't, you will probably see the stories in this book as silly/idiotic and without meaning. If you are interested in this community for the first time, I recommend Strauss' other book "The Game" as a more comprehensive overview before beginning to look at the errors of the community. ...more
2

Feb 08, 2013

Accidentally read this instead of the more famous book "The Game", but since I already started it, I just decided to finish it.

It was interesting just to see the perspective of his writing. I already knew the premise going into the game, so nothing was terribly shocking or surprising.

I actually felt most of his advice was focused on making the person a more social person - that advice can be seen in other universal personality-help guides, I think. Or rather... a lot of it felt like common Accidentally read this instead of the more famous book "The Game", but since I already started it, I just decided to finish it.

It was interesting just to see the perspective of his writing. I already knew the premise going into the game, so nothing was terribly shocking or surprising.

I actually felt most of his advice was focused on making the person a more social person - that advice can be seen in other universal personality-help guides, I think. Or rather... a lot of it felt like common sense.

The stories were also somewhat interesting, but not terribly.

Two stars because it was okay and I suppose it was worth reading just to see behind someone's eyes. I wouldn't really recommend it to anyone. If you want to read it, you'll realize that and find it yourself. Really. ...more
2

Feb 27, 2012

I decided to stop reading this, as I found it to be kind of silly. The "field exercises" struck me as ridiculous (one of them is to approach 3 different girls, and ask them where is the best place to purchase men's clothing). I get what the exercises are trying to do - they are trying to help one get over the anxiety of approaching a stranger. It's just not for me though. Performing such exercises make me feel like I'm setting myself up for the mother of all pranks. What exercises are next? Go I decided to stop reading this, as I found it to be kind of silly. The "field exercises" struck me as ridiculous (one of them is to approach 3 different girls, and ask them where is the best place to purchase men's clothing). I get what the exercises are trying to do - they are trying to help one get over the anxiety of approaching a stranger. It's just not for me though. Performing such exercises make me feel like I'm setting myself up for the mother of all pranks. What exercises are next? Go knock on my neighbors' doors to borrow sugar until one of them fucks me? There was also a small excerpt in the book promoting "self hypnosis", which made me roll my eyes. I wanted to continue reading, but there is a page that reads: "IF YOU HAVEN'T COMPLETED ALL OF THE EXERCISES YET, STOP READING HERE!" I'm never one to argue with a book, and I have no intention of "calling three strangers to ask them what good movies are out for me to see", so I stopped reading the book. Done. ...more
3

Aug 29, 2012

Full disclosure: I did not read the diary section, and am only commenting/rating the "Stylelife Challenge" from a Pickup perspective.

Rules of the Game serves a purpose. It introduces readers to the world of Pickup in practice. Most people who read The Game and think "Hey, I could really do this stuff" will probably want to read Rules of the Game. Just like The Game, this book is simply an introduction. Like all of Neil's book, it's fun, easy to read, and engaging. The reason I rated it what I Full disclosure: I did not read the diary section, and am only commenting/rating the "Stylelife Challenge" from a Pickup perspective.

Rules of the Game serves a purpose. It introduces readers to the world of Pickup in practice. Most people who read The Game and think "Hey, I could really do this stuff" will probably want to read Rules of the Game. Just like The Game, this book is simply an introduction. Like all of Neil's book, it's fun, easy to read, and engaging. The reason I rated it what I did, however, is because most people reading the "Stylelife Challenge" will expect a solid introduction to Pickup. They probably want someone to "hold their hand" through learning to be a pickup artist. Pickup is a skill and it is something that must be developed over time through much training and practice. This book is only an introduction; it's a good starter and will open your eyes, but it is not a complete training system. ...more
2

Dec 15, 2014

All I did was read it, so I realise I have no right to expect it to change my life.

To start of with, I thought maybe I might do these challenges, but the amount of time and confidence you'd need is insane. This is the problem – it's supposed to build your confidence but you need so much in the first place to make these "approaches".

Barely a day goes by when you don't read something that portrays heterosexual men in a negative light as creepy and sex pests. We just cannot win. So, to have the All I did was read it, so I realise I have no right to expect it to change my life.

To start of with, I thought maybe I might do these challenges, but the amount of time and confidence you'd need is insane. This is the problem – it's supposed to build your confidence but you need so much in the first place to make these "approaches".

Barely a day goes by when you don't read something that portrays heterosexual men in a negative light as creepy and sex pests. We just cannot win. So, to have the courage to "approach" female strangers really is a massive ask.

It's also the case that you couldn't do these challenges unless you lived in a large, anonymous city. The amount of single, heterosexual women you need to be exposed to would rule out many people straight away, including me.

It's sad that men should need to read a book just to teach them how to stop being hopeless with women, but this is a fact of life. There is the good-looking, confident minority and then there is the shy, six-out-of-ten-or-less, unconfident majority. I learnt my place a long time ago. ...more
4

Feb 20, 2008

I bought this book out of curiosity of what the Stylelife 30 day challenge would be like.

The first book, the book of short stories, was interesting and gave me something to read while my dinner was cooking. Neil Strauss is a good author and loves himself very much. Some women loved him too. They had dirty sex. It's formulaic, but entertaining.

The second book is the reason I bought the set in the first place. Day by day missions taking the most socially awkward person to the point where they can I bought this book out of curiosity of what the Stylelife 30 day challenge would be like.

The first book, the book of short stories, was interesting and gave me something to read while my dinner was cooking. Neil Strauss is a good author and loves himself very much. Some women loved him too. They had dirty sex. It's formulaic, but entertaining.

The second book is the reason I bought the set in the first place. Day by day missions taking the most socially awkward person to the point where they can get a date in 30 days. I found it help me get over talking to random strangers (day 5) then it started to stall out for me. I just couldn't find the motivation to make it past the mid point. Some things just seemed aimed at people far worse off than I was, and other portions (timidity with establishing physical contact) don't get covered.


*** SPOILER ALERT ***

The reason I stopped is that it ends with you planning a dinner party, and that is your date. I like to cook, I plan dinner parties already. I didn't think they were dates and I still don't.

...more
4

Oct 01, 2015

Overall, a good and mostly non-chauvinistic read. The best part of the book is the final 10 anecdotes which are mostly very funny and make a good impression. Sometimes the book feels a touch dated and fails to recognise how integrated technology is with our lives. It's also ridden with editorial mistakes and typos. Strauss could do with a new editor. I read the book based on (morbid?) curiosity rather than for self-help but it was still on occasionally insightful read none-the-less. I didn't Overall, a good and mostly non-chauvinistic read. The best part of the book is the final 10 anecdotes which are mostly very funny and make a good impression. Sometimes the book feels a touch dated and fails to recognise how integrated technology is with our lives. It's also ridden with editorial mistakes and typos. Strauss could do with a new editor. I read the book based on (morbid?) curiosity rather than for self-help but it was still on occasionally insightful read none-the-less. I didn't agree with all Strauss' views on philosophy but his views were well worded and sufficiently justified to be judged as intelligent.

I'd recommend this book to those interested in philosophy of sex and relationships as the perspective as quite unique. As a self-help guide, it REALLY needs a lot of time, effort and energy from the reader - and I mean that in a good way. This is not a "read it and your done" kind of manual. You have to live and breathe this stuff. The right sort of committed person could get a lot from the book though.

Overall, I'd give the book 7/10. ...more
3

Aug 28, 2008

Not quite as good as The Game, but a more interesting package - two mini-books together. Book one is kind of a supplement to The Game - more stories, but fleshed-out (no pun intended). The second book is an actual 30-day "Style-Life Challenge" self-help regimen aimed at taking shy guys from timidity to actually getting a date. It's a fascinating read, and offers a bunch of interesting and legitimate (but not cheesy or obvious) self-improvement tips and personal challenges/head games to become Not quite as good as The Game, but a more interesting package - two mini-books together. Book one is kind of a supplement to The Game - more stories, but fleshed-out (no pun intended). The second book is an actual 30-day "Style-Life Challenge" self-help regimen aimed at taking shy guys from timidity to actually getting a date. It's a fascinating read, and offers a bunch of interesting and legitimate (but not cheesy or obvious) self-improvement tips and personal challenges/head games to become more self-aware and confident. The downside of this, if one were to actually using it for its intended purpose (to get a date) and not merely as a piece of interesting reading, is that it vacillates between treating the reader/challenge-taker as a borderline autistic person (with baby steps like striking up a conversation with another human being and essential grooming for going out in public) and then expecting this person to do things that a significantly more socially confident person might even struggle with, without enough middle ground. Still, a fascinating read after you've finished Strauss' first book. ...more
4

Dec 15, 2012

You don't necessarily need to read any books on pickup. They're all boring and not particularly useful. If you could really score with tons of chicks by reading a book, only illiterates wouldn't be scoring constantly. And even illiterates would probably be doing well for themselves, because chicks like dumb guys. If you only read one pickup book, I'd go with Rules of the Game. It's split up into three parts: (1) A list of exercises to make you less of creep and maybe get some stank on your You don't necessarily need to read any books on pickup. They're all boring and not particularly useful. If you could really score with tons of chicks by reading a book, only illiterates wouldn't be scoring constantly. And even illiterates would probably be doing well for themselves, because chicks like dumb guys. If you only read one pickup book, I'd go with Rules of the Game. It's split up into three parts: (1) A list of exercises to make you less of creep and maybe get some stank on your hanglow; (2) A brief collection of pickup lines; and (3) A collection of short stories about various times that Strauss has banged chicks and it was somehow interesting. The Stylelife Challenge, the first part, isn't a routine so much as it is a 30-day program for self-improvement, including style, grooming, posture and what have you, and in that sense, it would probably be useful for pretty much any guy, regardless of your intentions. It makes for an interesting enough read, even if you don't plan to go through with it. The pickup lines I thought were hilarious and genuinely interesting, in a psychological trivia sort of way. And then there's the last part, with the sex stories. I probably would have enjoyed them even if they were Tucker Max-style tales of picking up some skank in a bar, but they were way more interesting than that. They're what Tucker Max was trying to pull off when this last book came out and he announced he was "retiring." They're filthy, juvenile sex stories that actually make you think about what's the point of trying to nail so many chicks. I feel somewhat enlightened for having read it. ...more
4

Jul 24, 2015

Although on the surface this can be seen as a book about learning the skills and various techniques of how to "pick up women", it is much more than that. Strauss is, in fact, teaching confidence, which is the ability to relax in social situations.
It's not necessarily about your looks, body shape etc, although he does deal with those aspects, too.
He attempts to set out in creating a better Self, that is modeled on who you actually are, rather than a faux you.
Some may see much of it as Although on the surface this can be seen as a book about learning the skills and various techniques of how to "pick up women", it is much more than that. Strauss is, in fact, teaching confidence, which is the ability to relax in social situations.
It's not necessarily about your looks, body shape etc, although he does deal with those aspects, too.
He attempts to set out in creating a better Self, that is modeled on who you actually are, rather than a faux you.
Some may see much of it as pointless, because they apply many of the techniques naturally and have confidence. The lucky few. But I have encountered many people out there, in the wide, wide world that don't have the natural assurance, knowhow and self-belief. Those people require some incentive, motivation, understanding and guidance. It's like anything else. If you learned badly at the start, or you experienced a bad initiation, then you need to re-learn or at least brush up on the obvious and understand where you are going wrong. It can't hurt, can it?

It's about creating a more attractive you.
It's about understanding the other half.
It's about creating good, realistic, achievable goals.
It's about using the skill you learn for good intent and not to simply manipulate.
It's about understanding what your primary motivation should be. Wrong motivation can be sensed by others & this is a NO NO if you want to make friends, (which is what it all boils down to, for me).
It's about getting out of your comfort zone and interacting, each time improving and growing in confidence.
It's about understanding how "all of the above" works.

Knowledge is power and in this case it will lead to a happier, more fulfilled life.
A pretty good read.

Sergiu Pobereznic (author)
amazon.com/author/sergiupobereznic
...more
2

Dec 06, 2013

The softball sequel to "The Game", "Rules of the Game" has little of its predecessor's unintentional humor and wryness about the failure of the pickup artist scene, and more a mishmash of half-baked ideas and concepts regurgitated from better self-help books.

There are two volumes included in this set:

The Stylelife Companion is a self-prescribed 30 day crash course in becoming a better person, both mentally and physically. While the book should get some accolades for introducing reflection and The softball sequel to "The Game", "Rules of the Game" has little of its predecessor's unintentional humor and wryness about the failure of the pickup artist scene, and more a mishmash of half-baked ideas and concepts regurgitated from better self-help books.

There are two volumes included in this set:

The Stylelife Companion is a self-prescribed 30 day crash course in becoming a better person, both mentally and physically. While the book should get some accolades for introducing reflection and self-improvement to "average frustrated chumps" who wouldn't otherwise pick up a self-help book, this material has been better explained elsewhere, and far more thoroughly. You don't need to pay $25 to learn to "radiate positivity" or host your own dinner party. As long as you have a will, you will persevere and succeed on your own terms. If anything, the material seems more geared to only make you more social, with very little in the way of actually number-closing or doing anything PUA-related.

The second volume, The Style Diaries, feels like leftovers that couldn't be put in the other book, and reading it for myself, the stories often came off as either wholly exaggerated or outright lies.

You get Neil seducing an elderly woman, him being caught between two sisters, trying to seduce a highly-placed national in a foreign country, trying to "Ethan Hunt" his way into his own apartment while with a woman and other forgettable tales. The stories are short and generally have little relevance beyond the standard PUA lines ("awaken her inner beauty", "it's the consequences we face that define us", etc).

All in all, it's not really worth the price. Just buy "The Game" instead. ...more
2

Sep 07, 2017

More for entertainment

The tips given in the book are for specific venues and specific type of people
3

May 01, 2019

This book is helpful in understanding connection between people
2

Aug 21, 2019

This book is far from perfect. Too much crack psychology mixed with pseudoscience about why women are different from men. But the book has one great secret: At heart, it's not really about meeting women. It's about salesmanship. I suppose Strauss realized the title "How to Sell Anything to Anyone" wasn't as catchy as "Rules of the Game." But it's true, the book's lessons and challenges focus on making people attracted to you and getting what you want from them. Some lessons are positive, like This book is far from perfect. Too much crack psychology mixed with pseudoscience about why women are different from men. But the book has one great secret: At heart, it's not really about meeting women. It's about salesmanship. I suppose Strauss realized the title "How to Sell Anything to Anyone" wasn't as catchy as "Rules of the Game." But it's true, the book's lessons and challenges focus on making people attracted to you and getting what you want from them. Some lessons are positive, like staying healthy and managing your appearance. Other lessons are negative, about how to identify people's hopes and fears and then bait them. Many tactics are tried and true, but the book could certainly benefit from stronger ethics. In the world of sales, whether a customer regrets their purchase is a minor problem. Whether a person regrets, say, having sex with you, is more serious. While Rules of the Game can help you get a date, you'll have to do a lot more work (and read different books) if you want to keep her. ...more
2

Sep 20, 2018

A 30-day training manual to change a dude with no luck in love into a Player. So some days you have to do some silly thing, like talk to some strangers. There were summaries of books such as The Red Queen, with the main focus on why women are attracted to successful men. Very politically incorrect, involving a lot of scripted openings and conversation openers, and playing mind-games with women. But then the book did say that it would make men ‘Players of the Game’. I think it is good to skim A 30-day training manual to change a dude with no luck in love into a Player. So some days you have to do some silly thing, like talk to some strangers. There were summaries of books such as The Red Queen, with the main focus on why women are attracted to successful men. Very politically incorrect, involving a lot of scripted openings and conversation openers, and playing mind-games with women. But then the book did say that it would make men ‘Players of the Game’. I think it is good to skim through, and some advice are useful (You do need to make your life interesting, and make the first move rather than stay home to play online games); however without due respect for women, I don’t think the relationship would be healthy as the reader is urged to go for next Game once the current one is successful. In reality, as long as men go out to have conversation with women, they would gradually learn how to date. The moment they are getting good at it, they find The One and get happily married and move on to have kids and family. ...more

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