4.35

5

Sep 06, 2007

I bought it...
I read it...
I read it for the second time around...
I've learned so many things that I can't reveal because I discovered so many things...to myself and even for the benefit of my significant other...
I applied it...
It worked...
It was successfuuuullll...
Investment...
Last wordS...
WORTH KEEPING!!!

4

Dec 05, 2012

Bella Swan should have read this book!

I am not really into self-help books like this because I really don't give a damn about guys. Sure, guys are such fascinating creatures. Sometimes I want them. But most of the times, I just want them to leave me alone. And no, I am definitely NOT a man-hater, I told you, they fascinate me. But I just couldn't make myself give a damn on whether men I know think I'm a doormat or a dream girl. I have much better things to do than that. And if a guy doesn't Bella Swan should have read this book!

I am not really into self-help books like this because I really don't give a damn about guys. Sure, guys are such fascinating creatures. Sometimes I want them. But most of the times, I just want them to leave me alone. And no, I am definitely NOT a man-hater, I told you, they fascinate me. But I just couldn't make myself give a damn on whether men I know think I'm a doormat or a dream girl. I have much better things to do than that. And if a guy doesn't like me anymore, sure as hell I won't try to woo him. There are a lot of fish in the sea. And we're living in a world with quite a number of oceans.

I enjoyed reading this book, though. I really think this book is a must read for all the girls out there who think that the sun revolves around their boyfriends. My friend who just got dumped by her boyfriend for being "too-clingy" recommended this book to me. She said that if she only had this book earlier in her relationship, her boyfriend might have never dumped her.
I don't know about that, but I think, this book might have helped her. Because this book shows that girls who value themselves, that are independent and have great self-respect and confidence are the ones who are really what you call: HOT.

Being a bitch here is defined not in a negative context. A Bitch is someone who loves herself more than any man, and will never let a man control here life, no matter how much she loves him. She doesn't take shits from men and
definitely doesn't tolerate being looked down upon like a doormat. She's independent, strong, intelligent, and has a life of her own. She doesn't sacrifice her other relationships just to suit the schedule of her boyfriend.
A bitch believes that a relationship needs mutual respect and trust between the partners. She believes that she deserves only the best because she's willing to give her best in return.
And yes, we all need to be a little bitch sometimes.

It is a perfect read for girls who needed a little bit of a boost on their self-confidence and for girls who are in a not-so-healthy and co-dependent relationship. This book has tips on how to keep things interesting and to make guys crazy over you.

I won't recommend it to guys though, because I don't want you to know our tricks. :) ...more

1

Dec 11, 2012

Speaking of the book objectively: It contais a number of advices on pursuing something called "worthy man" or "good man". Such a man is romantic and cares for her potential partner, but is also childish, ego-oriented and selfish. He must be conducted by flattery and misconception. Many of the techniques showed in the book are going to work on a large number of males, in my opinion.

It is also of my opinion that the outcome of this book is disgusting. All the prescriptive and inductive methods on Speaking of the book objectively: It contais a number of advices on pursuing something called "worthy man" or "good man". Such a man is romantic and cares for her potential partner, but is also childish, ego-oriented and selfish. He must be conducted by flattery and misconception. Many of the techniques showed in the book are going to work on a large number of males, in my opinion.

It is also of my opinion that the outcome of this book is disgusting. All the prescriptive and inductive methods on how a woman should "deal" with a man are the sign a given woman has been looking for the wrong male profile. Considering such a view, having a dog is much more rewarding and for half the effort.

It is my perception of what a worthy man is that makes me think I'd loath such treatment. The "dumb fox" - the archetypical woman who plays dumb to get what she wants and that is also the star role in the book - is not the woman I would look for, neither as a companion, nor as a friend. In fact, I'd like to keep all dumb foxes and their falsehood as away from me as I could.

I want a woman who has no need to deceive, nor is conceited and also not afraid to speak up for herself. She doesn't "keep her cards close", but puts everything in the table when the other side follows.

If you are a woman and want to board a relationship in which you manipulate and calculate a male in order to make him obey by sexual bribery and misdirection, please read it. It is probably going to both work and testify you found yourself a worthless mimicry excuse for a man, and, of course, that says something about yourself as well.

Enjoy while you can. ...more

1

Jan 21, 2011

I read this book because a friend suggested it and loaned it to me. I think this is a horrible book and I'll tell you why.

Most of the "men" described in this book are douchebags. Plain and simple. The author claims she got her information from actual men. Fine. I'm sure she did. But those men, if that is the type of information they gave her, are douchebags.

And, aren't we tired of dealing with douchebags by now? It's 2011 and I have self-respect. Too much self-respect to put up with a man who I read this book because a friend suggested it and loaned it to me. I think this is a horrible book and I'll tell you why.

Most of the "men" described in this book are douchebags. Plain and simple. The author claims she got her information from actual men. Fine. I'm sure she did. But those men, if that is the type of information they gave her, are douchebags.

And, aren't we tired of dealing with douchebags by now? It's 2011 and I have self-respect. Too much self-respect to put up with a man who always wants to chase me. Too much self-respect to put up with a man who likes to play games.

Is testing the other person out an inherent part of dealing with people? Sure. But, the tests need to be natural. Any man who doesn't call when he says he would just to test my reaction can leave me alone. That man is a liar and a douchebag.

I'm so tired of books that advise women to take lying as a normal part of getting to know a man. This advice was strewn throughout the book. It sickens me.

If men believe that they will get away with whatever they're allowed to get away with, then why should we even listen to them? Why should we care why they love bitches? I know I don't. Because I can have self-respect and love for myself without being a bitch. And, I don't need to own that word and gussy it up like it's a good word. It's not. I can't believe this author suggested that when your man finally calls you a bitch, you've succeeded at something. Any man I'm with better *never* call me a bitch.

This book really ticked me off. We need to up our standards. Is there some good advice offered? Yes, but it's on the backs of real women who know a loser when they see one. And, most of the book's advice only pertains to losers and the women who want them.

...more

1

Jun 26, 2012

This is the worst "self help" book I have ever read. The dumb fox theory completely negates the entire book. How are you going to prove you don't need a man around when you can't change a tire or lightbulb without him? RIDICULOUS! I'm not going to dumb myself down to make my boyfriend feel better about himself that's his insecurity issues to work on! This book basically teaches a woman how to play mind games and be passive agressive which in my opinion are NOT going to land you a healthy, long

This is the worst "self help" book I have ever read. The dumb fox theory completely negates the entire book. How are you going to prove you don't need a man around when you can't change a tire or lightbulb without him? RIDICULOUS! I'm not going to dumb myself down to make my boyfriend feel better about himself that's his insecurity issues to work on! This book basically teaches a woman how to play mind games and be passive agressive which in my opinion are NOT going to land you a healthy, long term relationship! ...more

4

Oct 02, 2019

Fun read!
Spent my time laughing with this book.
Though it was a little bit repetitive.
4.5 stars!

1

May 10, 2016

I solemnly swear that I am up to no good with this review


Curiosity never killed anyone.

Who? WHO TOLD YOU THAT?!

I read this book out of curiosity and for experimental purposes. I did it for science. Besides it was either this or 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen. R. Covey. I feel effective enough as I am right now. Should've gone with the effectiveness anyway.
So I spent the past few days learning about the bitch theory: How to be a bitch. The bitch lifestyle. What the bitch eats, I solemnly swear that I am up to no good with this review


Curiosity never killed anyone.

Who? WHO TOLD YOU THAT?!

I read this book out of curiosity and for experimental purposes. I did it for science. Besides it was either this or 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen. R. Covey. I feel effective enough as I am right now. Should've gone with the effectiveness anyway.
So I spent the past few days learning about the bitch theory: How to be a bitch. The bitch lifestyle. What the bitch eats, sleeps, thinks. Go for the crotch or rip his heart out straight up

But first. What the author means by this term - Bitch.

Bitch (noun)- A woman who won't bang her head against the wall obsessing over someone else's opinion--be it a man or anyone else in her life. She understands that if someone does not approve of her, it's just one person's opinion; therefore, it's of no real importance. she doesn't try to live up to anyone else's standards- only her own. Because of this she relates to man very differently

The “new and improved” bitch is not a bad thing. She is a refined version of the proverbial, “old” bitch. She’s not abrasive or mean, nor does she nag to get what she wants. She speaks with her actions, and she’s only a bitch when she has to be.

According to some, the word derives from the first letters in the following phrase: B abe I n T otal C ontrol of H erself. The only higher crown, the only higher honor, is to be called a “High Maintenance Bitch.” It’s a sign of success, indicating that this is the woman the guy ends up keeping.
Pretty great I'd say. I learnt a lot from this book...that I will not be using. Why? Because I don't want to be a "bitch." I disagree strongly with a lot of points in here. Nice girl syndrome? Maybe. Some points were solid, I won't do this book a dishonour and be oblivious to them but I believe you can be a "nice girl" and still be firm and strong. I believe you don't need strategies and game plans in relationships. Trickery and a whole lot of other shenanigans to effect commitment. If you do then don't be sorry when it feels like a lie. Because it is a lie. The problem wasn't the advice and tips itself, but more about the context and how they projected the imagery of puppet and puppet master.
This isn’t about how to play a game or how to manipulate someone. This is about whether you are genuinely needy, or whether you can genuinely show him that you’ll be an equal partner in the relationship. It’s about whether you are capable of holding your own in a relationship.
Eeeeeeeee WRONG. If all that planning and strategizing isn't manipulation then my name is Tuli periwinkle. That is too manipulation.
This book is so pretentious. This is the same book that seeks to expose and condemn the tricks men play and their own attention seeking methods. And yet it supplies us readily with tricks of our own. I'm imagining that scene from Pitch Perfect where the bellas have a riff off(Category: Songs about sex) with the Trebles. I'm imagining a red line and on both sides of it the two genders are armed, with swords drawn, and ready for war. I'm imagining Levana with her hands up in the air screaming: "Love is a conquest. Love is a war!" Someone's going to lose or get hurt.
However, when a woman makes him wait and he’s romantic over time, the dinners and the flowers keep on coming. Why? Because he formed the habit of treating her with respect before he got what he wanted.
Tell me something I don't know.
Have you ever heard of the theory of classical conditioning by Pavlov? The Russian physiologist carried out an experiment which in time garnered the term, Pavlovian conditioning. We know dogs normally salivate at the sight of food. "Okay", Pavlov said. This was an unconditioned response, as in something inherent and unlearned. Pavlov noticed that his dogs automatically associated food with his entrance into the room and always delivered a salivary response(assuming he came bearing gifts). The objective of classical conditioning was to get the dogs to associate a particular thing(stimulus) with the reward(food). To teach them to react this way. Even I'm not in support of this, I imagine a day of high frustration when you forget to bring the offerings, those dogs are going to bite you. But if you're lucky they'll go straight for the jugular and make it quick.

In his experiment, Pavlov used a bell as his neutral stimulus. Whenever he gave food to his dogs, he also rang a bell. After a number of repeats of this procedure, he tried the bell on its own. And what do you know? The bell on its own now caused an increase in salivation. The dog had learned an association between the bell and the food and a new behavior had been learnt. Because this response was learned (or conditioned), it is called a conditioned response. The neutral stimulus has become a conditioned stimulus. I don't think I need to explain how abnormal it is for me to think of this experiment while reading this book.

What woman doesn't want respect? But now we debate this saying: "The end doesn't justify the means." There's the common example of children who were beaten growing up good. Such great exemplary kids with such great unjustifiable scars. If you have to manipulate every time to get your desired result in a relationship, be this-be that-be those, twist and bend and change shape until you bend out of form, to a certain extent this tactic might be productive but - Where does your peace of mind lie? While this book may rely on a man's denseness(not me, the book implies), he's not stupid, he'll notice the pattern and act the way you want, get what he wants anyway and it all becomes reverse psychology. Say hello to the boomerang theory. I guess it's a win-win situation where we're all happy and satisfied but this kind of happiness can only be marked by impermanence. Always having to go through a ritual of push and pull - humans are not springs, even the most resilient toys get broken. Now with your brain juice bleeding out and him mentally exhausted, it's a wonderful life, right? There's a difference between being smart and being a strategist. I was also really annoyed by how the author's male references were cardboard-cut-out-one-track minded jerks.
Every man wants to have sex first; whether he wants a girlfriend is something he thinks about later. By not giving him what he wants upfront, you become his girlfriend without him realizing it" And after giving him sex, he would just let himself chase after the next hottie on the block.
I know one man and I can swear on my Harry Potter books that he is not a chasing sex animal or hunter on the prowl(Roarrr). But since the real references in this book outnumber my vote by many to one, I'll bow out of this argument.
It is of my opinion that yes, one shouldn't waste effort on the wrong person and lose one's self by giving too much but then you shouldn't resort to selfish, childish mind games and still lose yourself trying to act a role. It's like living on two extremes. How about finding a middle ground?

☑ First lesson should've been:
âž¡(Try to)Be okay with yourself as a person. As an individual. Throwing yourself into a role in a relationship is simply blunder-fail-bollocks-batshit-stupid.

And...
âž¡ I really felt sad reading some of the things the men who were interviewed for this book said. Some of them honestly came off as JERKS who never learned that Tom and Jerry games should never escalate outside of the screen. I look forward to them featuring in the sexy counterpart: Why women love jerks: The A-Z. A man's guide to being the greatest jerk of a woman's life - Grow up my friends.


âž¡ The only thing I can say concerning this book is take what you want and leave the rest, fashion it to your own use. Be yourself and if a man asks for something not you, run away. Fast. Until your legs touch the back of your head.

Initially all I had to say to this book was

The intention of this book is true. The contents... It's a matter of who's reading it and what they're taking from it. So the right thing to say is not: "This book is wrong" or "Whoo-hoo! Women empowerment gone awry." I liked quite a few things about this book, a few hold true, but this just wasn't me. For me. But on the bright side there were really stellar quotes that meant a lot to me. Like the one I leave you with now:
Throughout life, people will try to shake your faith in yourself. When this happens, remind yourself that the only way they can succeed is if you allow it. When you walk down the street of life, always hold your head high and keep walking. Don’t ever let anyone shake your faith in yourself, because that’s really all that you have. ...more

5

Aug 15, 2012

I felt compelled to write a review about this book because it changed the way I dated and most importantly changed the way I treated myself. This is one of the most influential self help books I have ever read and I have made all of my girlfriends read it. Sherri Argov is insightful and cuts through BS with her sword of truth. Yes the title is a bit much but you get the true meaning of the word bitch when you actually read the book. The underlying premise of the book is about having self I felt compelled to write a review about this book because it changed the way I dated and most importantly changed the way I treated myself. This is one of the most influential self help books I have ever read and I have made all of my girlfriends read it. Sherri Argov is insightful and cuts through BS with her sword of truth. Yes the title is a bit much but you get the true meaning of the word bitch when you actually read the book. The underlying premise of the book is about having self respect, self love and maintaining control of yourself and your power as a woman. I have read this book time and time again and can tell you with utmost conviction that all the principals in the book work like a charm with men. It's not about playing a game, its about holding your own. They absolutely love bitches, they can't get enough of us. This book is a secret weapon for women every where. I truly felt awakened and empowered in every sense of the word after first reading this book. It truly changed my life and I have not said that about many books. A must read for all women! ...more

5

Dec 12, 2008

The fact is, you're not supposed to read a book like this, let alone like it. When this book came recommended to me from a few members of a woman's group I belonged to at the time, skeptical wouldn't begin to describe what I thought. I mean, the title alone kind of wants to make you gag. Most men hate bitches, don't they? This book can't help you find, keep or get a man, right? Well, right. But I think that's the whole point of the book and possibly its beauty.
After a few chapters, you realize The fact is, you're not supposed to read a book like this, let alone like it. When this book came recommended to me from a few members of a woman's group I belonged to at the time, skeptical wouldn't begin to describe what I thought. I mean, the title alone kind of wants to make you gag. Most men hate bitches, don't they? This book can't help you find, keep or get a man, right? Well, right. But I think that's the whole point of the book and possibly its beauty.
After a few chapters, you realize the book is more about you as a woman and being a strong woman who can sift through the nonsense some men spew, than it is about finding, dating and keeping a relationship. The one thing this book will teach any woman is to know that "you are all you need." Even if you already know this, it's a good thing to have confirmed. And knowing this, and truly believing it, is what will make a man love and respect you---according to Argov.
I say it's at least worth a look-see. ...more

3

Sep 28, 2012

I read this book several years ago when I was younger and not so smart. At the time I had been dating someone for about 6 months without the title or commitment and unfortunately, I was the girl in this book. A few months later I got tired of the bs and turned into the " bitch" that this book tells you to be, not because I did it intentionally, but because I just didn't care anymore. And guess what, IT WORKED! he did a 180 and was the one chasing and wanting the commitment. I gave it a shot but I read this book several years ago when I was younger and not so smart. At the time I had been dating someone for about 6 months without the title or commitment and unfortunately, I was the girl in this book. A few months later I got tired of the bs and turned into the " bitch" that this book tells you to be, not because I did it intentionally, but because I just didn't care anymore. And guess what, IT WORKED! he did a 180 and was the one chasing and wanting the commitment. I gave it a shot but my heart just wasn't in it because I never stopped not caring after the bs. A few years later I met my current boyfriend, and a year and half later we are both completely happy and in love living together. The thing I realized about this book though is, that yes it works, but don't you want to fall in love with someone and be loved back for being YOU? No mind games, tricks or fronts? My current boyfriend fell in love with me for me, because I am nice, love to cook for him and clean around our house, because when we met I did things like give him pedicures. We spent everyday together and didn't play games. We were honest, ourselves and happy. And I found a hard working , successful , respectful , responsible, family orientated, committed loving man. The book works YES, I used its tactics for several years by just not caring or having my heart invested, but really, don't you want a man that loves you for you, not bs mind games you can play? ...more

4

Oct 13, 2008

I remember once, one of my friends told me that she'd been in a Ndwah held by Dr. Sana Abed. And as Dr. Sana always concern with girls' issues, problems and relationships, she advised all the girls to read this book. To say the truth, I was shocked. How come someone like her recommends such a horribly entitled book?!! ……. But now after I read it, I figured out that she just made a very important recommendation and MARVELOUS as well.
=================

Why men love bitches ? is a help-self \ I remember once, one of my friends told me that she'd been in a Ndwah held by Dr. Sana Abed. And as Dr. Sana always concern with girls' issues, problems and relationships, she advised all the girls to read this book. To say the truth, I was shocked. How come someone like her recommends such a horribly entitled book?!! ……. But now after I read it, I figured out that she just made a very important recommendation and MARVELOUS as well.
=================

Why men love bitches ? is a help-self \ relationships book. What is meant here by Bitches or the Bitchy attitude is those women who stand for their ground, strong enough, ain't swept away by romantic fantasy, in control for their life/decisions and the bosses of themselves. That what the author means by bitches and NOT the other common meaning.

It's one of those how-to-win-your-man books, but it takes a totally different track. Instead of the regular romantic tips and advises or how to look hot and pretty, Sherry Argov came up with a "focus on your life" theory.

The book is like MORE THAN fantastic. The only reason I didn't rate it 5 out of 5 is that since this book is written according to certain society types, in many places you'll find yourself flipping pages and thinking "ok , I have nothing to do with this….. nor that……I won't be in such a situation". But still since it digs up in relationships issues, you still benefit an awful lot.

I really fell for this author. For me, she is the most amazing nonfiction author until now. I loved her hilarious chit-chatty writing style with her sense of humor. She had me at hello, I just started reading the book yesterday, and I ended up finishing 9 chapters in one sitting. I believe many women didn't like her argument because it's kinda harsh. She is like someone who says the awful truth in your face and when you dare to take a defensive situation she slaps that face.

DEFINETLY IT'LL BECOME ONE OF MY FAVORATES!!



...more

5

Sep 23, 2012

6 stars! A 100% honest book... Definitely worth keeping!
I first picked up this book attracted by the intriguing title. So how does Sherry Argov define a bitch?

Bitch (n): A woman who won’t bang her head against the wall obsessing over someone else’s opinion— be it a man or anyone else in her life. She understands that if someone does not approve of her, it’s just one person’s opinion; therefore, it’s of no real importance. She doesn't try to live up to anyone else’s standards— only her own. 6 stars! A 100% honest book... Definitely worth keeping!
I first picked up this book attracted by the intriguing title. So how does Sherry Argov define a bitch?

Bitch (n): A woman who won’t bang her head against the wall obsessing over someone else’s opinion— be it a man or anyone else in her life. She understands that if someone does not approve of her, it’s just one person’s opinion; therefore, it’s of no real importance. She doesn't try to live up to anyone else’s standards— only her own. Because of this, she relates to a man very differently.



Qualities which define a bitch:
1. The biggest variable between a bitch and a woman who is too nice is fear. The bitch shows that she’s not afraid to be without him.
2. If the choice is between her dignity and having a relationship, the bitch will prioritize her dignity above all else.
3. Whether a girl has terms and conditions indicates whether she has options. Almost immediately, she presents herself as a doormat or a dream girl.



It isn't that she is advising women to play tricks or be cruel. It's just that she feels(and I agree) that most relationship problems arise because men do not understand the worth of their partners. Once you give in, they start taking you for granted, simply because they miss the chase. And that's the problem that she addresses. How to always keep him guessing(and the mystery quotient high), and correct him firmly if you feel he's stepping out of his line. No nagging, no whining. Because that SIMPLY DOES NOT WORK. Men either phase out, or get defensive, or altogether start ignoring you. And which girl would want that?



THE MANTRA:
Busy yourself with things you enjoy doing. If he can't give you a time, don't give him a date. Don't fret if he does not call. Either he's doing so because he knows you wouldn't mind(i.e he does not value your concern) or he wants to give out the vibes that he's not THAT INTO YOU! Well, play it cool girl. In either case, he'll come back if he realizes that he could lose your company if he does not make an effort! A woman looks more secure in a man’s eyes when he can’t pull her away from her life, because she is content with her life.



So, love yourself, before you set out to love someone else. And don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself or speak your mind. It will not only earn his respect, in some cases it will even turn him on. Fly high. Be a DREAMGIRL!

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P.S: Also, read the book. ...more

2

Feb 28, 2008

I picked up a used copy of this book as a gag gift, and my fascination with the intensive note-taking and underlining the previous owner had done in the copy lead me to read a good chunk of this book.
Of what I read the basic concepts are acceptable enough; women should value their dignity and not allow their suitors to take advantage of them. However, the idea that a woman with a backbone is a "bitch", and the idea that women must be manipulative to gain fair treatment in a relationship (as I picked up a used copy of this book as a gag gift, and my fascination with the intensive note-taking and underlining the previous owner had done in the copy lead me to read a good chunk of this book.
Of what I read the basic concepts are acceptable enough; women should value their dignity and not allow their suitors to take advantage of them. However, the idea that a woman with a backbone is a "bitch", and the idea that women must be manipulative to gain fair treatment in a relationship (as demonstrated through chapters like "Dumb Like a Fox: How to convince him he's in control while you run the show") does much more to reinforce negative perceptions of women and harm woman's perception of themselves then to empower women. ...more

1

Feb 03, 2016

I read this on the recommendation of a friend, and it was the worst book I have ever read in my life - which is really saying something, because I read 50 Shades of Grey.

If this book is by any means an accurate depiction of modern relationships - hell no. I will gladly just stay single for the rest of my days rather than dealing with this fucking nonsense:

"Whenever he does something handy around the house like putting up a shelf, praise him. It doesn't matter if the shelf hangs at a 45-degree I read this on the recommendation of a friend, and it was the worst book I have ever read in my life - which is really saying something, because I read 50 Shades of Grey.

If this book is by any means an accurate depiction of modern relationships - hell no. I will gladly just stay single for the rest of my days rather than dealing with this fucking nonsense:

"Whenever he does something handy around the house like putting up a shelf, praise him. It doesn't matter if the shelf hangs at a 45-degree angle." What the actual fuck? No.

"Men have big egos and they need to have them stroked. This is what the 'dumb fox' does." No.

"A tip: When you are at his place any day of the week, don't do any housework" What the - WHY IS THIS A TIP? Are women doing this? Fine. I agree with this one. STOP THAT.

"Never ask a man to do something more than twice or he'll feel as though he's being scolded by Mom." Are you dating a 12 year old?

"If that fateful day ever does arrive when he tells you that you are a bitch? Stop, and take a deep breath. Then enjoy the moment. Smile internally as you say to yourself, 'Okay. Now I know he truly does love me.'" Holy hell. This is the most terrifying paragraph in the English language. Nope nope nope nope nope nope nope. ...more

1

Oct 10, 2007

This book in my opinion Really sucks.
Why?
beacuse I believe anyone strategizing sooo much to not be treated like a "door mat" needs advice on self steem NOT on how to trick men.
In my opinion you are trying to fix something that is not the root of the problem.

4

Jul 29, 2011

This book is great advice for any women are are pushovers. I think it's geared for those women, so that's why the book's content can seem so extreme and harsh. But before people pass judement on the book, the author Sherry Argov, points out from the beginning what she really means by the work 'Bitch' within the content of her book. She says NO woman should be what most people picture when they think of a bitch: abrassive, bad attitude, ungrateful, mean, etc... What Sherry means by the word This book is great advice for any women are are pushovers. I think it's geared for those women, so that's why the book's content can seem so extreme and harsh. But before people pass judement on the book, the author Sherry Argov, points out from the beginning what she really means by the work 'Bitch' within the content of her book. She says NO woman should be what most people picture when they think of a bitch: abrassive, bad attitude, ungrateful, mean, etc... What Sherry means by the word bitch, is a woman who is independent, doesn't give up her interests or her life for anyone, doesn't compromise things that she values, stands up for herself when someone tries to take advantage of her, and doesn't take bullshit from anyone. The 'bitch' is the woman who has confidence, is comfortable and perfectly happy with who she is, and says 'This is who I am, either you like it, or you don't. Take it or leave it.' She is definitly still VERY nice and respectful to people, and handles herself very maturely with consideration towards others.



I feel that there are a lot of woman out there who suffer from low self-esteem, and maybe they'll be positively influenced by reading this book. Too many of those low self-esteem woman will pretend to be stupid, or give up their friends, the gym, or any other interest - because she's madly in love and is afraid if she still takes the time to do her own thing and doesn't spend 100% of her time with a man, he will somehow lose interest and leave.

Just be who you are, and he'll take you or leave you. So what if he leaves? Why would you want someone who doesn't want you?? And seriously, don't give up your life's passions, your values, or your dignity for ANYONE.



As much as I liked the book, one particular bit of advice that I thought was ridiculous: "Don't kill a bug, change a light bulb, or fix anything around the house in front of him because it will make him feel inferior" Ok, I wouldn't call myself a Ms. Fix It but I can definitely handle some tools. I have a motorcycle that I have worked on myself, and I can change my own car's oil and tires. This goes back to the being yourself part: He'll either love you, or he wont.' My boyfriend thinks it's really sexy that I can be handy and that I ride motorcycles. Everyone's different, and you can't generalize between the genders too much.



I do have to say that there are a few moments in the book that I don't agree with. In certain sections, I felt the author encouraged too much game-playing that is on the verge of manipulating a man. I have to say that women need to be honest. Dont play games. Be communicative - guys arn't mind readers. Of course, in dealing with people (and I mean anyone, not just a man), you sometimes have to say things in a certain way, with certain timing, or tone of voice. That's called people skills, and not game playing - we all do it, and you'd be lying if you said it is never necessary or it's wrong. Employ the people skills you need, as long as you're goal is for the relationship to be positive, reciprocal, and happy on BOTH sides, not just for you to get what you want.



Overall though, it was a great read, with (mm...for the most part) great advice to encourage woman to be strong and smart!



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Oct 25, 2016

3.5 Stars

I picked this out of sheer curiosity and somehow it turned into a bookish detour.
Non fiction is unfamiliar territory but I was pressed for time due to festive torture...ahem..I meant cleaning.

Bitch (noun): A woman who won’t bang her head against the wall obsessing over someone else’s opinion— be it a man or anyone else in her life. She understands that if someone does not approve of her, it’s just one person’s opinion; therefore, it’s of no real importance. She doesn’t try to live up to 3.5 Stars

I picked this out of sheer curiosity and somehow it turned into a bookish detour.
Non fiction is unfamiliar territory but I was pressed for time due to festive torture...ahem..I meant cleaning.

Bitch (noun): A woman who won’t bang her head against the wall obsessing over someone else’s opinion— be it a man or anyone else in her life. She understands that if someone does not approve of her, it’s just one person’s opinion; therefore, it’s of no real importance. She doesn’t try to live up to anyone else’s standards— only her own. Because of this, she relates to a man very differently.

The book has a risky title but the author clarifies her stance by providing this definition. This convinced me to give the book a chance.

In the very first chapter, she raises a key point - women are conditioned to give themselves away. The source of approval is always external - be it the boyfriend, family or society. Someone else is at the steering wheel and this is detrimental to a woman's happiness.

Another thing that I liked about this book - most relationship books revolve around men and how they are martian rubber bands and woodland creatures.
Bridget Jones readers will get this one ;)

But what about the women? Where do they go wrong? Why are they depleted and overwhelmed in relationships? What is their strategy to navigate this sinister labyrinth?

The major takeaway is a woman needs her own approval and is responsible for her own happiness. Lets not turn this into a team exercise.

Man woman relationship dynamics lead to endless debate and sketchy findings. It's a trope in many popular sitcoms - Friends, Seinfeld, Coupling, Sex and the City - We want to know what the other side is thinking and such discussions are a source of endless amusement.

This book tries to answer these questions with some tips and a lot of humor. I finished this one pretty fast - the book uses biological roles, some research and plenty of anecdotes. Give this one a try for a fresh perspective on relationships.

Now for some relationship advice from The King.






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2

Jan 22, 2012

Although this book contains some good advice, handy tips and plenty of focus on self-worth, it has one fault that prevents it from covering all bases. The author's theories all work on the premise of traditional gender roles. There is a lot of focus on the alpha male stereotype, and throughout the book the idea that all women have the same goals in a relationship is prevalent.

Not everybody fits into the author's polar presentations of male and female. She draws a lot from anecdotal evidence, Although this book contains some good advice, handy tips and plenty of focus on self-worth, it has one fault that prevents it from covering all bases. The author's theories all work on the premise of traditional gender roles. There is a lot of focus on the alpha male stereotype, and throughout the book the idea that all women have the same goals in a relationship is prevalent.

Not everybody fits into the author's polar presentations of male and female. She draws a lot from anecdotal evidence, and so too shall I: I am a woman, and I love the thrill of a chase. There is a whole section devoted to why women ought not to act as the initiator, which I personally found disheartening. Although the title suggests a forward thinking, liberal attitude towards relationships, this book was very conservative.

Finally, what bothered me most was the "dumb fox" theory - in short, that women should pretend the men in their lives are the ones with the authority whilst achieving their own goals in a sneaky or subtle manor. That is entirely the wrong message to send out to women, young or old. It contradicts the notions of pride and independence found elsewhere in the book. ...more

1

May 05, 2017

I started reading this book while I was going through a rough patch in my relationship, and I'm plain disgusted by the contents of the book.

Here's a gist of the book: 'If you are a hard-working, sincere, honest-to-God, monogamous, affectionate, wear-your - heart-on-your-sleeve kind of person, who values relationships, you're a NICE girl. If you are a shrewd person who knows how to get the better of other person in any relationship, by means of lies, manipulation, deception, hot/cool attitudes, I started reading this book while I was going through a rough patch in my relationship, and I'm plain disgusted by the contents of the book.

Here's a gist of the book: 'If you are a hard-working, sincere, honest-to-God, monogamous, affectionate, wear-your - heart-on-your-sleeve kind of person, who values relationships, you're a NICE girl. If you are a shrewd person who knows how to get the better of other person in any relationship, by means of lies, manipulation, deception, hot/cool attitudes, and other power plays, then you are a BITCH.

The author repeatedly urges you to transition from Nice Girl to BITCH, so that you may finally have your shot at love. She has sat down with so many men & boys of all ages to gain insight and help her sisterhood through these relationship mind-games. And in case, you are naive enough to not take her word for 'what men love', she'll directly quote them and turn you into a believer.

Towards the end of the book, there is even an appendix of "Sherry's Attraction Principles" which just reminded me how much of a waste this book was.... The horrible advice, definitely fake quotes, the constant stories about power playing in relationships... It was just too much bullshit.

I'm shocked that there exists a sequel to this: WHY MEN MARRY BITCHES! Ladies and gentlemen, you don't need to read either of these 2 books to understand why SOME men love/marry bitches, I'll tell you right now:
Because it TAKES ONE TO KNOW ONE, and no one else will put up with either of them ...more

2

Jan 22, 2015

I thought this book was extremely depressing.

I will say the first chapters are all about self confidence. Don’t chase a man, don’t drop your plans, put your own needs first, don’t lose yourself falling for a stranger, don’t put yourself down, invest in your career hobbies and friends, keep your sense of humor alive, don’t act out of fear or insecurity. The book talks a lot about the excuses we make for people we care for when they don’t reciprocate- so that’s where that second star is coming I thought this book was extremely depressing.

I will say the first chapters are all about self confidence. Don’t chase a man, don’t drop your plans, put your own needs first, don’t lose yourself falling for a stranger, don’t put yourself down, invest in your career hobbies and friends, keep your sense of humor alive, don’t act out of fear or insecurity. The book talks a lot about the excuses we make for people we care for when they don’t reciprocate- so that’s where that second star is coming from.

But I’m a naturally open, brutally honest person. I pride myself on wearing my heart on my sleeve, which is certainly a turn off to many people, nevermind men. This trait alone the book considers a kiss of death. In order to look out for my priorities and happiness, I have to shut up. I have to be funny, and charming, classy but kinky, challenging but not aggressive, aggressive but not too independent (at least once I’ve nabbed the sucker). Secure and ready to walk off in a moment- that’s what it takes to keep a man. And the book repeated over and over, you’re not acting secure to get a man, you’re acting secure because it’s what’s good for you- and it just so happens that’s what men want.

But in so many places the author advised flat out deception and manipulation, while insisting that’s not what she was advocating. Comparing men to seals clapping their fins for salmon (salmon being sex, obviously) was discouraging. Framing men as brutes, incapable of intelligent conversation or of discussing ~feelings~ without fainting from boredom, doesn’t make me want to be with anyone. Of course, she does take a moment to point out that any man who describes himself as a feminist is likely to quit his job and take up residence on the couch while you support him. Seriously.

The whole goal of this book is to find a man who will treat you with respect. Which is great! But there never seemed to be…well, anything about love. It seemed to be about how to behave, to get people to behave- and then you have a “successful’ relationship, whatever that means. I have to wonder if the author expects anyone to honestly communicate ever, or is it all just maneuvering to make sure you get what you deserve? And that anyone who does come to you with honesty isn’t coming to you with honesty at all. There’s assholes who treat you like badly and who you can manipulate, and assholes you treat you well and who aren’t worth your time. Or something. Sherry just knows one type of man, and he’s essentially an animal that needs to be trained.

Be aloof. Break off contact (over and over, possibly the main point is “men don’t respond to words, they respond to no contact”). Never need him. Most of all, never be needy. It’s another kiss of death to show a man how much you care for him. Whether you do or don’t, you better work to hide it, and work at not wanting him so bad, because that makes you an empowered, independent woman. She refers to romantic relationships as business transactions. Everyone has to bring something to the table, and your crazy woman emotions are certainly not an asset.

Peppered in-between every extreme statement that makes you lose faith in humanity, is a statement to counter balance it all. She’s not saying treat him like dirt- appreciate him subtly, with a level head, more than anything- strategically. I was exhausted just imagining living a life constructed around making all the right decisions when interacting with someone who at any minute might become a selfish, self-serving asshole who would stop at nothing to take advantage of me. The worst part is, she seems to think men can’t help it. It’s their predatory, aggressive nature. And if we’re going to get along, we have to show we’re equals without letting on what tricks we’re using.

I used the advice in the first half of the book, and got a rather good result. Then proceeded to hate the human race for the next week because if this does work, I just have no faith anymore. None. The fella in question can go to hell. I don’t know what Sherry would think of me, but I’d like to think there’s someone out there who is clearly as bad at playing all these games as I am, in a way that we can be open about. To be frank, if I need a strategy to love you, I ain’t gonna be loving you. And if I got nothing else out of it, her book showed me that much.
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3

Nov 11, 2007

Ok, first of all, I know you're reading this and rolling your eyes!!! (hi Jafar, hi Rustam!) It was a gag gift I got from my friend for my birthday so I gave it a whirl while I was at the gym- and finished it in a snap. It's actually pretty good! Bitch isn't really "bitch" in the traditional sense of the word. Basically her point is that women should have their own lives going on and that that's more attractive to men. Seriously since this is news to so many women, I'm happy for the author that Ok, first of all, I know you're reading this and rolling your eyes!!! (hi Jafar, hi Rustam!) It was a gag gift I got from my friend for my birthday so I gave it a whirl while I was at the gym- and finished it in a snap. It's actually pretty good! Bitch isn't really "bitch" in the traditional sense of the word. Basically her point is that women should have their own lives going on and that that's more attractive to men. Seriously since this is news to so many women, I'm happy for the author that she made a grip of money on spelling it out.

This book is unfortunately not as funny/entertaining as some of its counterparts ("He's Just Not That Into You" is some damn funny writing, for example), but it's an intriguing addition to the self-help shelves (which, granted, are folding under their own weight). But she offers a delightful recipe for microwave popcorn (which she professes is the only thing you should cook a guy)) and 100 pointers on how to get a spine.





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4

Apr 16, 2012

Why Men Love Bitches is a great self-help book for women who end up putting too much of themselves into a relationship either habitually or particular to one relationship. If you do not have problems with giving too much of yourself to a relationship, then don't even bother to read this book. It's not intended for you.

Me? I do have the tendency to give my all (too much) so this book was very helpful for me. Does it say stuff that I already know? Of course. Any good self-help book is stating Why Men Love Bitches is a great self-help book for women who end up putting too much of themselves into a relationship either habitually or particular to one relationship. If you do not have problems with giving too much of yourself to a relationship, then don't even bother to read this book. It's not intended for you.

Me? I do have the tendency to give my all (too much) so this book was very helpful for me. Does it say stuff that I already know? Of course. Any good self-help book is stating common sense/the obvious, but the really excellent ones say it in a way that motivates you to make real change. This book did that. It's funny and down-to-earth and doesn't pull any punches. I found myself making tons of highlights.

Is this book reductionist about female and male behavior and gender roles? Yes. That's why I rated it 4 stars instead of 5. That being said, being overly-simplistic about how men and women are does not detract from the overall message of the book, which is that a woman should keep her center and some healthy boundaries at all times. Respect yourself and your lovers will respect you. Short, simple and absolutely necessary for some women to hear. ...more

3

Jun 15, 2007

Wow, where do I start...I would never have read this book just because of the horrible title. However, I'm glad Marsha explained the title so that I could get by the "horrible" name thing I was dealing with. This book gave me a little insight to why nice women like myself sometimes finish last and can't seem to get a nice guy in line to "do right"...well, since right is a matter of perception and interpretation I better say for a man to treat her like the queen that she is.. I enjoyed this book Wow, where do I start...I would never have read this book just because of the horrible title. However, I'm glad Marsha explained the title so that I could get by the "horrible" name thing I was dealing with. This book gave me a little insight to why nice women like myself sometimes finish last and can't seem to get a nice guy in line to "do right"...well, since right is a matter of perception and interpretation I better say for a man to treat her like the queen that she is.. I enjoyed this book because it gave me a different insight into when nice girls do some of the things that their "mama" taught them in order to "hold a man..(i.e. food is to his heart and stuff like that)" is not the best method for gaining a mans respect. However, chapter 8 was a bit unrealistic for me. This is a smooth read and I'd advise having some page markers available because some areas you will probably want to refer back to for reference. ...more

4

Mar 09, 2013

والله كتاب جميل,معرفش ليه ناس كتير بتوقف عند العنوان,ايه يا اخوالنا ما درستوش بلاغة فى تانية ثانوى واللا ايه:)),ممتع الكتاب ,طريقة العرض,المنهج المعتمد من ناحية الكاتبة لا يشعرك لا بالملل ولا بالنفور,يمثل خطرا ساحقا ماحقا علينا,معشر الشباب والرجال الغلابة"جدا والله:)))",ولكنه اضافة لكلا النوعين الانسانيين اذا ما صلحت النوايا للاستفادة مما يقدمه الكتاب من نصائح وملاحظات,واخيرا وقبل ان أترككم فى رعاية الله وأمنه,حبيت هنا أحط ريفيو عجبنى,لاخينا فى الانسانية سام,من باب الحوار مع الاخر"اللى انا والله كتاب جميل,معرفش ليه ناس كتير بتوقف عند العنوان,ايه يا اخوالنا ما درستوش بلاغة فى تانية ثانوى واللا ايه:)),ممتع الكتاب ,طريقة العرض,المنهج المعتمد من ناحية الكاتبة لا يشعرك لا بالملل ولا بالنفور,يمثل خطرا ساحقا ماحقا علينا,معشر الشباب والرجال الغلابة"جدا والله:)))",ولكنه اضافة لكلا النوعين الانسانيين اذا ما صلحت النوايا للاستفادة مما يقدمه الكتاب من نصائح وملاحظات,واخيرا وقبل ان أترككم فى رعاية الله وأمنه,حبيت هنا أحط ريفيو عجبنى,لاخينا فى الانسانية سام,من باب الحوار مع الاخر"اللى انا معرفوش اساسا,اذن الى سام والسلام ختام:I felt compelled to write a review about this book because it changed the way I dated and most importantly changed the way I treated myself. This is one of the most influential self help books I have ever read and I have made all of my girlfriends read it. Sherri Argov is insightful and cuts through BS with her sword of truth. Yes the title is a bit much but you get the true meaning of the word bitch when you actually read the book. The underlying premise of the book is about having self respect, self love and maintaining control of yourself and your power as a woman. I have read this book time and time again and can tell you with utmost conviction that all the principals in the book work like a charm with men. It's not about playing a game, its about holding your own. They absolutely love bitches, they can't get enough of us. This book is a secret weapon for women every where. I truly felt awakened and empowered in every sense of the word after first reading this book. It truly changed my life and I have not said that about many books. A must read for all women!
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2

Jun 12, 2008

Mr. Angelina loves this book because he feels vindicated. He is in MAD hearts with the queen bitch (me, unless he has some other special lady friend I don't know about. In which case I have one thing to say: SHARE GODDAMIT.)

At three in the morning when a booty call won't take the hint, a gal doesn't call her mousy friend. She calls me. And with a hearty, "You're gonna have to get on up out of here, mutherfucker!" the assclown is tossed out on his keister. And if he doesn't back sass i might even Mr. Angelina loves this book because he feels vindicated. He is in MAD hearts with the queen bitch (me, unless he has some other special lady friend I don't know about. In which case I have one thing to say: SHARE GODDAMIT.)

At three in the morning when a booty call won't take the hint, a gal doesn't call her mousy friend. She calls me. And with a hearty, "You're gonna have to get on up out of here, mutherfucker!" the assclown is tossed out on his keister. And if he doesn't back sass i might even give him his clothes.

Anyway, this book is not going to turn into some assertive, sassy, "Who the fuck do you think you're talking to. I know you ain't talking to me." kind of girl if genetics didn't already give you a head start. Also, if you need a book to tell you that owning your power and guarding it jealously is the only way to have a life free of foot marks on your back, well, you're basically fucked.

Still, this book did make me laugh and I did enjoy pretending to be offended and shocked when Mr. Angelina pointed out that I can be a little crispy.

Personally, if you're looking to learn to assert yourself, I'd suggest taking martial arts at some strip mall. Hey, a million skinny math nerds can't be wrong! ...more