3.68/5
Author: O'Toole Ph.D, Mary EllenAlisa Bowman
Publication Date: Sep 25, 2012
Formats: PDF,Paperback,Kindle,Hardcover
Rating: 3.68/5 out of 411
Publisher: Plume
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As one of the world's top experts on
psychopathy and criminal behavior, Mary Ellen O'Toole has seen
repeatedly how relying on the sense of fear alone often fails to protect
us from danger. Whether you are opening the door to a stranger or
meeting a date you connected with online, you need to know how to
protect yourself from harm-physical, financial, legal, and
professional.
Using the SMART method, which O'Toole developed and
used at the FBI, we can confidently know how to:
An especially useful book
for women living alone, parents who are concerned about their children's
safety, and employers worried about employees who might go postal,
Dangerous Instincts gives us the tools used by professionals to navigate
potentially hazardous waters. Like The Gift of Fear and The
Sociopath Next Door, it will appeal to anyone looking to make the
right call in an ever threatening world.
Aug 09, 2019
This was an interesting read. it reminds me a bit of the gift of fear.The author shows various situations along with tips on how to stay protected and safe.I would say it was well written and my only complaint is that I wish it was longer because it didn’t cover nearly as much as I would’ve liked.Jan 13, 2013
This book has useful information about personal safety and the red flags of pyschopaths. However, it needs drastic editing. Drastic scalpel-like editing. It is overstuffed with overbearing preambles, condescending repetition, and a silly, superfluous acronym system. Add in the jumpy disorganization and it is a tedious read.Feb 05, 2015
This is a difficult review. With all due respect to this author, she has some very good things to say, but there is a big problem with her book. I took away some good things from it, (for example, how to tell if someone is lying) but also have some strong objections for one premise she makes. Early in the book, there is a weak argument with some ridiculous questions that "prove" your intuition is not to be trusted...However, later on in the book, interviews have questions like, "How did the This is a difficult review. With all due respect to this author, she has some very good things to say, but there is a big problem with her book. I took away some good things from it, (for example, how to tell if someone is lying) but also have some strong objections for one premise she makes. Early in the book, there is a weak argument with some ridiculous questions that "prove" your intuition is not to be trusted...However, later on in the book, interviews have questions like, "How did the person make you feel?" In my opinion, and in my experience, feelings should never be discounted. Intuition is real and should not be discounted. It has saved my life more than once. Listening to children talk about their feelings is especially important. As an educator of children for over 25 years, I feel that listening to the feelings of a child is vital. The same is true for adults. Never overlook or discount your "gut" feelings or intuition. It is there for a reason.Jun 27, 2012
The author of this book has something important to share with the world but unfortunately she doesn't seem to be able to use the medium she chose to get her message out effectively.Jan 31, 2015
In the words of Indigo Montoya, "I don't think that words means what you think it means."Feb 16, 2013
I don't know why I keep reading these types of books. They never teach you anything other than that you're constantly in danger, and you can never correctly judge people. Not a fun read. Not a useful read. Also, I'm not a married middle-aged white suburban lady with small children, which is who this book is written for, for some reason.Jan 07, 2012
This book could have been half the length; repetative and mildly annoying in writing style. The author tends to talk down to her readers. Interesting subject, poorly executed.Feb 24, 2012
Informative & interesting. Thank you to my delightful cousin for being the reason why i read this. :)Jul 02, 2012
Heh, goodreads asks "What did you think?"Sep 23, 2012
I've read a ton of true-crime serial killer books and most of my reasoning is that I want to be sure never to become a victim. This book is for all of the folks out there (like me) who are too nice and have a hard time saying no and worry about hurting peoples' feelings AND forget to guard their own safety. It teaches about not only evaluating the danger from people we don't know that well but,more importantly, evaluating the danger from people we deal with every day and that we trust our homes I've read a ton of true-crime serial killer books and most of my reasoning is that I want to be sure never to become a victim. This book is for all of the folks out there (like me) who are too nice and have a hard time saying no and worry about hurting peoples' feelings AND forget to guard their own safety. It teaches about not only evaluating the danger from people we don't know that well but,more importantly, evaluating the danger from people we deal with every day and that we trust our homes and our children with. It also teaches about making smarter decisions in our everyday life, which, basically EVERYONE could benefit from. ...moreApr 26, 2013
O'Toole describes some of the cases she's worked on, which is interesting, but the main focus of the book is helping readers make decisions based on logic instead of emotion. She explains that many of us base decisions about whom we allow close to us based on superficial cues that are not meaningful in terms of real risk, and offers step-by-step instructions on making better decisions by thinking through all aspects of a situation. Many of the situations she explores are those that normal people O'Toole describes some of the cases she's worked on, which is interesting, but the main focus of the book is helping readers make decisions based on logic instead of emotion. She explains that many of us base decisions about whom we allow close to us based on superficial cues that are not meaningful in terms of real risk, and offers step-by-step instructions on making better decisions by thinking through all aspects of a situation. Many of the situations she explores are those that normal people make on a daily basis: Should you let your child spend the night at someone's house? Should you let a repair person into your home? Should you open the door to a stranger? I'm sure I will refer to this guide in the future. ...moreMay 28, 2018
skimmed through the last third. i wish the tone wasn’t so condescending and there was more content on actual physical safety crisises. skip this one, there’s probably better guides out there.Jul 08, 2018
I picked up this book, first, because nobody wants to be a victim and I tend to worry more than the average bear. Second, I thought the title was a direct response the the best-selling book by Gavin deBecker, called The Gift of Fear, which I loved and have recommended highly.Apr 21, 2013
This book was a bit disappointing; it was a very basic primer about not falling into typical "safety myths" that most people take for granted (which amounted to superficial stereotypes for the most part). O'Toole's interviewing techniques are nothing new to people who have learned about active listening, but very useful to those who haven't done so before.Jan 09, 2013
Something nebulous about this book. Very basic level and I think does not quite follow through. Some discussion of sociopathy vs. psychopathy vs. mental illness--good topics to clarify. Timely mention of Andrew Kehoe, who in 1927 blew up his home and a school via dynamite, killing 45 children.Aug 11, 2013
I loved this book for its psychological insight. People so often think that "gut instinct" is reliable when in fact it is not. Psychopaths, for example, are experts at making a great first impression. They often have families, good jobs, and all the appearances of normalcy. There is nothing about them that would trigger a instinctual "gut reaction" of fear. This book is about using behavioral analysis to examine how people act to determine whether or not they should be trusted, and how to rely I loved this book for its psychological insight. People so often think that "gut instinct" is reliable when in fact it is not. Psychopaths, for example, are experts at making a great first impression. They often have families, good jobs, and all the appearances of normalcy. There is nothing about them that would trigger a instinctual "gut reaction" of fear. This book is about using behavioral analysis to examine how people act to determine whether or not they should be trusted, and how to rely less on emotion and "instinct" and more on sound principles of subtly "interviewing" and observing people. I thought it was fascinating, albeit terrifying with its many horror stories of rape, murder, torture, etc because people trusted untrustworthy people. This book was written by an FBI behavior analyst. Very thought-provoking and interesting. ...moreDec 02, 2011
This book was different from what I expected. I wanted to hear about the cases she worked on and the things that helped solve cases. Instead this book was about learning how to evaluate situations and people in your life. It read more like a text book and even had bullet points of what you just read at the end of each chapter. She did share some of her experiences working for the FBI, but they were very brief descriptions.Oct 15, 2012
Pros: Great premise: here are all the ways and reasons your gut feeling and/or intuition can fail you, here's why you've come to rely on them as decision-making mechanisms, and here's what you should do instead.Mar 30, 2015
This book is an excellent primer on how to sharpen your awareness of what may be perilous situations for anyone wending their way through modern, 21st-century problems. Ms. O’Toole calls upon her considerable expertise in deciphering the misleading cues given to us by people who are trying to take advantage of our goodwill, ignorance or supposed “instincts†of what constitutes a decent human being. Do you want to let your child have his or her own computer in his or her room? Answer: no. Should This book is an excellent primer on how to sharpen your awareness of what may be perilous situations for anyone wending their way through modern, 21st-century problems. Ms. O’Toole calls upon her considerable expertise in deciphering the misleading cues given to us by people who are trying to take advantage of our goodwill, ignorance or supposed “instincts†of what constitutes a decent human being. Do you want to let your child have his or her own computer in his or her room? Answer: no. Should you trust that guy whom you met on a first date when he starts talking about all the bad relationships he’s had in the past? Should you buy that house? What questions should you ask before hiring someone? Should you let that girl babysit your child?May 10, 2014
I was excited to read this book about personal safety by an FBI profiler. During the author’s career, she interrogated psychopaths, gained their trust, and obtained info from them about their crimes. The purpose of the book is to help us identify dangerous people and situations. The author believes we are too trusting and we go by our gut feelings about whether a person seems “nice.†She teaches the reader more objective ways of assessing people.Apr 30, 2018
Fairly entertaining, with practical advice for things like interviewing a house painter. I picked it up because my mom happened to be at a talk the author gave.May 14, 2018
Good reference or training manual for observation based information collection and decisionmaking.Aug 20, 2019
After reading this book, as a minister and counselor I believe that everyone who can should get this book and read and re-read it. There is so much valuable information that can be gleaned. A friend loaned me this book to read and I now see areas where I can improve myself in regards to people. I am also definitely going to get a copy for myself.Apr 30, 2019
I really enjoyed this book. It had a lot of useful information on how to correctly, and logically evaluate the safety of a situation or if a person is a danger to you. It had some very good tips on how to recognize potential dangers but also how to use these skills in everyday situations such as hiring a babysitter or interviewing someone for a job.Jul 14, 2017
Many of the reviews have already described this book well. For me, the second have was much better than the first. There is some interesting and useful information, and I will be more aware of concerning, threatening or dangerous people and situations thanks to the book.Take your time and choose the perfect book.
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